What's in a Name?

It's a time-old question. Exactly what IS in a name, anyway? It's time we answered that question.

  

  

It's a fair question, I suppose; so let’s pick a name at “random” and see what words we can find; okay, I’ve pulled a “totally unknown name” from the Internet, and let’s see … hmm, Okay, the first name here is,

“Donald.” Well, let's see what we have here: there's

           “old dad nod, no loan lad dolla.” 

 What? Oh, sorry, there’s only one “l” in Donald. My apologies. Still ...

----------------------------------------

Now, let’s see, there’s a middle name here,

  

 “John.” Well, there's only “ho,” "oh," "on," and “no.” Not much there, huh? Of course, “john” is a word by itself, so maybe we get:

          “oh, no john, ho.”  or, conversely, “oh, no ho, john.” or perhaps, "oh, no john on ho"

 

----------------------------------------

 

Boy, it it getting hot in here?

 

----------------------------------------

So, uh, let’s see that last name: hmmm, “Trump.” Well, I see

          “rum rump rut put.” -- Hmmm, I'm sorry, but there's nothing there. No matter how you try to work with "Trump,"  you get nothing. There's not a sane thought to be had in there! 

----------------------------------------

Maybe we should try one word from each name to see if anything makes sense. Let’s see … how about,

          “old ho rump” or “loan john rump” -- Nah. 

Hmmm, maybe we should just take all the words from all three names, shake em up in a hat, and spill them out on a table and see what we get:

AND, WE HAVE:

          “Dad nod, loan lad 7 ¼” , john Biltmore load, rut old ho rump.” 

Hmmm, I see the size and brand tags from my old hat came loose. I guess it’s good I wasn’t wearing my old fur Beaver.

 

----------------------------------------

 

And, thanks for playing, people!

    

    

Author's Note

Sorry, everyone, I was bored and nothing's on TV but shows I've seen a million times. Go ahead, smite me!

Reviews

[Samuel Dickens]

This is pwetty kwazzie, but my brain doesn't hurt too much--not enough to smite you, at least. Do you think anyone will ever be named "Don" again?

[FlatDaddy]

Now, wouldn't that be nice? Of course, instead, they'd probably all be named Peter --like we need more dicks, huh?

[FlatDaddy]

Off course, you know that now I have to do an audio version, right?

[Thomas W Case]

This is wonderfully absurd and inventive! I love the playful way you deconstruct the name—it reads like a whimsical puzzle or performance. The humor and randomness really carry the piece. Made me smile!

[FlatDaddy]

Hi. Thomas! Merry, Ho, and all that good stuff to you, and I'm glad you liked this little experiment of mine. But I had a couple of new ideas with it -- just minor -- and thought you might like to give it another quick read.
FD

[Thomas W Case]

lol. Good stuff.

[ETERNITY]

Yep! Some of my writes are like that. It's fun, though! I see you had a good time! And it's funny!

[FlatDaddy]

Thank you, Eternity. It was just a throwaway piece, a bit of fun. Glad you enjoyed it.