How much am i going to remember before its all gone

As young as i could remember ive had memory issues. Ive always been forgetful. And everyone even my family has been conscious about it, even myself. But when is it concerning? Thats what i tried to ask google but no luck sadly.

Recently as of 12/20/25  ive had some memory issues that have gotten worse after the past few months. Worse as in i cant remember plans from a few weeks ago. Not even reminders dont even remind me the conversation for the plan was made. Some of my friends and my boyfriend have also noticed it getting worse aswell. But its always excused, “ Oh yeah shes just like that.” “Yeah she just doesnt remember well. “ “ Shes probably not going to remember.” 

I ask myself at points how long until i forget all of these people. How long until i forget myself. I find myself loosing my own personality it feels like. Emotions still feel fresh like a child just learning sadness for the first time but thats just how emotions are right? Why is it so unfamiliar though? I guess i must be spiraling because we all have lived once and we all get one life, all experiences are new, but some can be familiar, Right? 

My friends and family around me though. How long until i forget key parts of them? How long until i forget their faces? Will i still remember the sound of my mothers voice by the time im 30? I mean i cant even remember her smell and its almost been a year since i havent seen her. Will i be confused when i next see her again? Being conscious of your own memory decline is hard to think about, hell is every thought a step closer to loosing 10 more memories? Every time i say i dont remember is a conscious disappointment and feeling of confusion of my own decline. And i cant get in too deep into that confusion because im still mid conversion and i dont want to make the person im talking to feel sad for me, stress myself out in the process. But are they concerned too? Typically im talking to my friends about anything and have those forgetful moments with them i see their concern on their face sometimes, it makes me believe i need to see someone for this persistent memory issue. 

Stuff like math is always difficult and confusing for me too. I can still add and subtract my one plus ones but getting to that plus 20s and 30s starts to hold me up for minutes. I do this math at work every day how can i not add 20 to 10? 

Anyway. Im just yet another someone typing into a digital void. 

Author's Note

Ignore my grammar please.

Reviews

[Kane Hagwood]

Well, it sounds like you've got a lot of heavy stuff going on in your life. My own memory isn't as great as it could be, and I'm sorry to hear you've been having trouble with yours. My best advice to you is to write. Make a journal. Write stories. Take pictures. You may be able to find ways to "train" your memory better. It's good to remain optimistic about such things. I hope life gets better for you.
-Kane

[FlavouredCoconut]

Thank you, i have started to write and take lots of pictures to remember things, for im also a phototgrapher lol, but thank you for the note and i do belive your right possibly from past tramua, but i have been happy with my friends and family lately so reason im so concerned as of late is, im happier but memory worse..ier just confusing to my young mind is all

[Kane Hagwood]

It's all about those small steps helping you overcome something difficult like memory loss. Do what you can, and be grateful with what you've got. And I also feel like a photographer from all the photos I take to help me remember stuff haha.