The Defeated Heart

Emotionally beaten.

He pulled the flesh--

moth-eaten skin,

thin broken bones,

swollen heartache.

He closed his eyes--

unholy doors,

hallow stone tombs,

phantom mourners.

He made a scar--

weepy river,

maple branches,

cracks in the walls.

He held his tongue--

bloody prayers,

gnawing sadness,

kneeling defeat.

He kept the tears--

absinthe rainfall,

silver starlight,

bleeding dreamscape.

She drowned her heart--

rotten coffin,

bitter hymnal,

darkened chamber.

Reviews

[Ken e Bujold]

Very interesting piece Dominik. tight rhythm, well-chosen line breaks, and enjambment of images. Metaphors I particularly enjoyed: moth-eaten skin/thin broken bones...great image for love weary.
the idea of a scar as weeping river, maple branches cracks in the wall
bleeding dreamscape

will definitely be back to see what else you are up to
Ken