Our Lover: Fall

I set out to capture the feeling of Fall, and this is what I wrote.

Fall is like a lover
Returning from a trip
Longing to see his darling
And bathe her in gifts
He arrives without warning
In the middle of the night
And awaits to surprise her
In the early morning light
She awakes to twirling leaves
His way of holding her
A gentle caress
In happiness, he sighs
And bathes her in his breath
A cool breeze
That carries his whisper,
"I love you."
She gazes at the sky
A crisp, blue ocean
His caring eyes
He gives her a fanciful feast
Composed of his gifts
Foods of the earth
But their love is fleeting
And soon he must depart
So, with his last breath
He promises her his heart

Reviews

[Cynthia]

I agree, therhyming of this poem makes it much better and flows well througghout the poem. I love how you describe fall and love, it is a very original poem, I agree with this as well. And this is so sweet, you have let readers see the beauty of fall and how sweet it can be! Wonderful!
I look forward to read more of your work!

[Twilight]

A brilliant rhyme scheme. This piece is also quirky and original. Certain lines are quite passionate, as if describing a genuine lost lover. Rather a good poem - thankyou, for sharing this with us! Keep writing!