Dear Above: Percolating the Clouds to Make Misty-Morning Dew

A Poem by Grumpie

Contemplation over change- trying to stop fear from its rage.

My sweet familiar is terrified of change,

She knows not her bravery’s vast range.

I watch her hesitantly step onto the porch,

Then scuttle back inside, though singed by the torch.

This morning I find flow to be sticky,

Raising out of my bed was rather tricky.

I have a thought over residing here,

That complacency will fill my fear.

My hopes to be independent will flee,

Floating away with a blustering breeze.

The divinity of parting clouds will freeze,

Leaving me on my lonesome to simply be.

“What of my dreams!” I’d cry to above,

Who replies with a sturdy white dove-

She sits now on the railing, cooing so clear,

Fearless over my voice’s grief drawing near.

Then the bells chime eleven o’clock,

Music fills the sleepy town’s flock.

If only I could let go of these ponderings,

Find true rhythm in reality's wanderings.

Acceptance must find my heart,

Oh Dear Above, let fear depart.

The dove takes flight,

I watch with delight,

One small, hesitant step taken into fresh air,

My small cat with the gentle wind in her hair.

I smile at her from my new, regal seat,

As she looks below at our homely retreat.

Here I know, I’ll find love, success, and peace,

As this morning came with the cloud’s release.

© 2025 Grumpie

Author's Note

A cat named Millie, she really is silly.

My Review

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Featured Review

JayG

Keep in mind that rhyming is not the purpose of metrical poetry. The rhyme is an accent. What matters is the thought being expressed. And far too often you’re bending the line to the needs of the rhyme, which gets in the way.

It’s also hard to follow because you’re editing from the author’s seat, where you have context and intent that the reader lacks, guiding your understanding. Instead, edit from the chair of your reader, knowing only what they know as you read. Having the computer read it to you can allow you to better hear the flow as reader will. That can make a huge difference. Even better is to have someone else do a cold read. But who wants their friends to see them cry? 😆

You’re also ignoring prosody, which is vital to establishing a cadence that the reader will fall into.

One of the best poems I’ve found that demonstrates this is, The Cremation of Sam McGee. Written over 100 years ago, by Robert W. Service, it still has the power to get the reader tapping a foot to the rhythm of it as they read (It also made the man lots of money by selling a LOT of books), and bring a smile at the end.

https://www.poetryfoundation.org/poems/45081/the-cremation-of-sam-mcgee

And read his bio (link at at the page’s bottom). The man lived an astounding life—one I desperately envy.

That aside, there’s a LOT to writing poetry that’s not obvious. They have, after all, been refining and expanding the skills of it for centuries. So, dig into them. Knowledge, I’ve found, is a damn good working substitute for genius.

For metrical poetry, a great place to begin is with the excerpt from Stephen Fry’s, The Ode Less Traveled, on Amazon. Mary Oliver’s, Rules for the Dance is also an excellent book on the basics of that style poetry.

Her, A Poetry Handbook, is a gem, for non-metric poetry technique, filled with little surprises.

Sorry my news isn't better, but since such problems are invisible to the author, I thought you might want to know.

But whatever you do, hang in there and keep on writing.

Posted 6 Months Ago

It’s also hard to follow because you’re editing from the author’s seat, where you have context and intent that the reader lacks, guiding your understanding. Instead, edit from the chair of your reader, knowing only what they know as you read. Having the computer read it to you can allow you to better hear the flow as reader will. That can make a huge difference. Even better is to have someone else do a cold read. But who wants their friends to see them cry? 😆

You’re also ignoring prosody, which is vital to establishing a cadence that the reader will fall into.

One of the best poems I’ve found that demonstrates this is, The Cremation of Sam McGee. Written over 100 years ago, by Robert W. Service, it still has the power to get the reader tapping a foot to the rhythm of it as they read (It also made the man lots of money by selling a LOT of books), and bring a smile at the end.

https://www.poetryfoundation.org/poems/45081/the-cremation-of-sam-mcgee

And read his bio (link at at the page’s bottom). The man lived an astounding life—one I desperately envy.

That aside, there’s a LOT to writing poetry that’s not obvious. They have, after all, been refining and expanding the skills of it for centuries. So, dig into them. Knowledge, I’ve found, is a damn good working substitute for genius.

For metrical poetry, a great place to begin is with the excerpt from Stephen Fry’s, The Ode Less Traveled, on Amazon. Mary Oliver’s, Rules for the Dance is also an excellent book on the basics of that style poetry.

Her, A Poetry Handbook, is a gem, for non-metric poetry technique, filled with little surprises.

Sorry my news isn't better, but since such problems are invisible to the author, I thought you might want to know.

But whatever you do, hang in there and keep on writing.

Rating /100

2 of 2 people found this review constructive.

6 Months Ago

No worries at all that's why I'm posting, a good critique helps you grow. I've known my meter to nee.. read more

Reviews

jacob erin-cilberto

for some rhyming comes naturally as a vehicle in which to write. I think you steer it well.
Your writing has meaning but is playful at the same time.
And I really don't lose the idea in your rhyme...I find it a fun way to get to that meaning. And I am not a fan of rhyme in general.
j.

Posted 5 Months Ago

1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

DIVYA

Then the bells chime eleven o’clock,
Music fills the sleepy town’s flock.

Sounds of an idyllic little town. Millie sounds adorable. As do your musings here. I think accpetance makes life beautiful. The dove is a signal of all things good. I love how the poem ends on a happy and positive note.

Posted 5 Months Ago

5 Months Ago

It's a very quaint place, I'm learning to love it. I enjoy seeing you pop up with reviews, much appr.. read more

MarthaKlokke

I like this poem. Don't Worry too much about all that down below. Rhyming is important.

Posted 5 Months Ago

1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

5 Months Ago

Thank you Darling, I'm happy you're here.

Davidgeo

Everyone is alone. Together we experience this. Do not be afraid. I hate to quote an american president at this time but... "the only thing we have to fear, is fear itself". President Franklin D Roosevelt (back when presidents made sense)

Posted 5 Months Ago

1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

5 Months Ago

Thank you Davidgeo, I think you state a wise phrase.

JayG

Posted 6 Months Ago

You’re also ignoring prosody, which is vital to establishing a cadence that the reader will fall into.

https://www.poetryfoundation.org/poems/45081/the-cremation-of-sam-mcgee

And read his bio (link at at the page’s bottom). The man lived an astounding life—one I desperately envy.

Her, A Poetry Handbook, is a gem, for non-metric poetry technique, filled with little surprises.

Sorry my news isn't better, but since such problems are invisible to the author, I thought you might want to know.

But whatever you do, hang in there and keep on writing.

Rating /100

2 of 2 people found this review constructive.

6 Months Ago

No worries at all that's why I'm posting, a good critique helps you grow. I've known my meter to nee.. read more

Kady R.

Hiii Gruummpie!!!

I enjoyed reading this poem the ryhming is sooo well done!!

I also related to the spiritual dynamic in this poem "oh dear above let fear depart" this line has so much strength to it because there's an intention there. And how afterwards the dove takes flight showing the prayer has been heard (is what I gathered from it). Those lines was very inspiring for me.

Thanks for sharing!! Also congratulations on the book!!🤗🤗🤗

Posted 6 Months Ago

1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

6 Months Ago

Sometimes I don't even realize what imagery I'm portraying, thanks for providing your interpretation.. read more

6 Months Ago

I know I can relate!! I love reading reviews because the interpretation I get to read. Its amazing�.. read more

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290 Views
6 Reviews

Added on July 14, 2025
Last Updated on July 14, 2025

Author

Grumpie

Rochester, NY

About

I am a 25 year old artist, working on a children's book "How to Tame the Grumpies", currently reading Parzival. I just moved from Rochester NY into the Boonies and want to make sure I can still find a.. more..