powerful haiku…so few words, yet a grand impact…may we all find that perfect peace
Posted 2 Months Ago
2 Months Ago
I hope you're right... I still seem to be searching for it. Thank you for the lovely review on such .. read moreI hope you're right... I still seem to be searching for it. Thank you for the lovely review on such a dated piece.
Hello, how are you doing today? I had a little free time so I thought I might read some interesting pieces on the Cafe. This was the first item on my newsfeed so I thought I might take a look. I question the title after reading this haiku however the title "Snow Envy" seems like it would be better if it were titled "Envy of the Snow" or "My Envy for the Snow" because the words snow envy seem to give the snow the emotion of envy rather than the narrator, but that is just my opinion.
I like how you described the snow as "winter's diamonds." It gave the snow beauty and prestige, adding a tone of admiration. I like how subtly that admiration turns to envy which I thinknis a common thing in society. It gives a humanistic view to it besides the blunt idea of the desire for peace
I also like the last line because it males me think of how peaceful nature is because it is just so natural.
I say good job.
Sincerely Jazzsoulkeke,
God bless
Posted 11 Years Ago
11 Years Ago
Hey, Jazzsoulkeke. First, I want to thank you for such a thoughtfully analytical review, don't get t.. read moreHey, Jazzsoulkeke. First, I want to thank you for such a thoughtfully analytical review, don't get them enough around here. I toiled with the title, but felt the current one best described the subject and emotional tone, collectively. I'm glad you were able to enjoy the piece and sincerely thank you for leaving me with your honest thoughts.
It would indeed be wonderful to know the peace of a falling snowflake... beautiful in its simplicity, unburdened by the troubles of Life... This is a beautiful haiku, Travis.
Posted 11 Years Ago
11 Years Ago
Thank you, Rita I owe this to Pryde. Wanted to put a piece of me in it, comprehensively of course. I.. read moreThank you, Rita I owe this to Pryde. Wanted to put a piece of me in it, comprehensively of course. I'm glad to know it came out so successfully.
You like snow? It's beautiful but I prefer sun but your words are intricately beautiful like snowflakes and I truly love those.
Posted 11 Years Ago
11 Years Ago
I actually despise snow. Lol wrote this after one of this year's first snow fall. Thank you for such.. read moreI actually despise snow. Lol wrote this after one of this year's first snow fall. Thank you for such lovely thoughts on this piece.
I have just started playing around with Haiku's and this is a great example.
Really enjoyed this and look forward to reading more of your work.
Thanks for sharing
Posted 12 Years Ago
12 Years Ago
Thanks, bro short poetry isn't usually my thing, but I'm glad you enjoyed this piece. If you want s.. read moreThanks, bro short poetry isn't usually my thing, but I'm glad you enjoyed this piece. If you want some really great examples of haikus, it would be a disservice for me not to direct you to, "Pryde Foltz." She is a few comments down (if you don't know her that is). I'm looking forward to see what you come up with, be sure to send some R/R.
Thank you, Renee. It's great hearing from you. I hope the New Year has been well to you thus far. Th.. read moreThank you, Renee. It's great hearing from you. I hope the New Year has been well to you thus far. They indeed were the powdery snowflakes. ;)
Thanks, Pryde this is actually my 2nd or 3rd Haiku. I'm glad I didn't strike out though. Lol short p.. read moreThanks, Pryde this is actually my 2nd or 3rd Haiku. I'm glad I didn't strike out though. Lol short poetry is not my strong point.
12 Years Ago
I think you got it but go with your passion.
12 Years Ago
Thanks, I'm sure my pen will find itself on this road again.