'Starlight'

In awe of the crimson sky

Dusk kisses day and waves 'Goodbye'

My mind then closes down

As I feel her presence all around

In vacant wonder I open my eyes

I breathe.. taking in the nighttime sky

Her tears sparkle under starlight

As our love shines brighter than nite...

Reviews

[Leo]

I admired many words and lines..Dusk kisses day and waves goodbye was brilliant..a vacant wonder was also a skillful twist of words..very melodic and reads with natural flow and ease rhyme on point I think it was super!..except a slight suggestion to the very last line it threw me off completely because it didn't rhyme and I felt there was something missing so it was like someone pulled off the cord and the music suddenly stopped..perhaps

Her tears sparkle under starlight
As our love aligns brighter than daylight

[brian]

I took your advice (=
Thank you.

[Karmee]

I loved this write, This is so good.
Love the rhyme scheme

[Asante]

This was beautifully picturesque, to say the very least. Such wonderful imagery painted here by way of some excellent lines, brother. The art of 'feeling' is a glorious thing, and never let anyone tell you otherwise. :)

[brian]

Thank you Sante.

[horizon]

Wow...it's very calm when I read it..it gives a very peaceful feeling when I read it... crimson sky wo