Silent words, in some empty place.

She wanted to be a poet,

not knowing,
not understanding,
each metaphor muddled the page
with snarled similes
benign and befuddled.

The theme was vague,
the ambition wasted,
and time had expired.

Each word lay
in a grammatical grave,
invisible to a poem-lover's eyes.

They died in a hidden place,
uneasy and quiet,
like a botched poetic stillborn.

Reviews

[Light and ashes]

really something.....This is a tragedy??

[Relic]

It is L. Thank you for the comment. Much appreciated.

[Relic]

It's from the mind of Relic. BTW.

[Light and ashes]

You are very welcome.

[Chris Shaw]

I thought here of the poems published on site which receive no comments. How disheartening that must be for those brave enough to put their work out there for scrutiny. It takes guts to do that. Or maybe the poems that are discarded before publication. I have had many of them. I keep them for a rainy day. Thank you Tim for allowing my mind to wander.

[Relic]

Yes, Chris, it took guts and we all did it at one time or another. In some cases, it still does. Thanks. :)

[Coyote Poetry]

Us, who love to write. We question why often.
"Each word lies
in a grammatical grave,
invisible to a poem-lovers eyes."
I love the books of Nevil Shute and he seemed forgotten. His book "A town like Alice and On the beach. I can read a hundred times. I believe, the saddest ending to a book is the ending of "At the beach." Where the officer gave the death pill to child and wife. He got a drink and he took the pill. I love books. I hope we don't forget the great writers.
Coyote

[Relic]

I hope not either, Coyote. I appreciate the comment, thanks. :)

[Coyote Poetry]

You are welcome my friend.

[John the Baptist]

The imagery here is dark but effective. Many wish to write poetry, but it lies beyond their skills. Their efforts fall short and die, thus the grave and stillborn symbology. Still, it's good for people to try, and W?C gives them that chance.

[Relic]

Yes it does, John. Thanks for your thoughts.

[Tate Morgan]

We all have a pile of them. Those we didnt quite think came up to muster.

[Relic]

Thanks for your thoughts, Tate.

[Susan 🦋]

Nothing is every wasted. Words, thoughts or feelings expressed... It is your own willingness to convey what lies within and you're the only one that matters. :-) Keep writing.

[Relic]

I appreciate your review, Susan. Thanks.

[Robert Trakofler]

Oh if I could not feel this way at the end of every write I scrawl Mr. Perdition what a strange feeling that would be my friend! Satisfaction hmm a novel concept... but in truth then I would probably be dead or at least my voice would be

[Relic]

Well, Robert, I often feel the same way which is why I wrote this. I deleted more than eight or nine poems last year when they sat there unread for days. Self-doubt will probably never help either one of us. I'm just taking more time now on a poem than I used to. This poem was revised three times.
Thanks for the review.

[Robert Trakofler]

it is a perfect example of the strange and true kinship of artistry my poet friend!

[Relic]

Yes, it is, Robert.

[Jennifer Patino]

Being read makes the writing come alive in my opinion. Sure, as creators, we've molded a body, but the reader gives it its breath. Clever write. Very nice.

[Relic]

Thanks, Jennifer. :)

[redzone]

hmmmm guess it depends on what you mean by "missteps" Relic... I like this one from you... there is frustration in writing poems that no one reads or in writing poems that you feel are "stillborn"... I know I have felt this way on more than one occasion... and you have captured in artistic form this feeling very well...

[Relic]

I appreciate your thoughts, Redzone. Thank you.