NEW WRITERS!

Just some thoughts.

Hello there. If you're a new writer here on this site, I speak for many when I say--welcome. Writers cafe is one of the best writing sites on the web for its ease of use and friendly layout. You have the option to write whatever you want and read whatever writer you'd like. The site also has friendly people. (smiling here). 

My writing has been among those posted for many years but I'm in no way a moderator or "Popular member" asserting my ego. I'm merely here to try and understand and help you.

Let's take a look at some things about the site. 

FRIEND REQUESTS 

If for personal reasons you don't want to get reviews or friend requests, there are options to opt out. But for those that do, read on.   

Writing reviews is a good way to get noticed. It's the foundation for getting reviews on what you've written if that's your goal. A friend request allows you to stay in touch with writers you like and vice-versa if they accept your request. 

Sadly, for years, there has been an annoying tradition for writers to seek a friend request from someone without reviewing him or her first. Why is this annoying? Well, posting a review before sending a friend request makes the writer more confident in returning the favor. Otherwise, they may not know who you are.  

Imagine standing in a restaurant and you get a note from someone saying they'd like to be your friend. How odd would that be? :) But if that same person came up to you and said Nice shoes! You'd feel confident in saying hello to that person again on another day. That may be an odd (and silly) example, but you get the idea. If they decline you, they have their reasons.

If you are hesitant to write a review because you're not confident in your abilities, try looking at what others write and you may get ideas. Even if you have to paraphrase something you read, it may be a good start. Any review that genuinely shares how you feel after reading a poem or story is good as long as you don't try and insult the writer.

If you have no interest in giving reviews, you are free to follow a writer without having to ask for a friend request. If your only motive is to get reviews, that will come off as pretty selfish and disqualify you from any future reviews.  

CRITIQUES

I have learned, improved and appreciated the suggestions from others on how to improve what I've written. Sometimes our mistakes are more evident through someone else's eyes. However, If you don't want advice or suggestions from others to improve what you've written, simply saying so in the author's notes should be enough. I've seen lots of people ignore the suggestions of others when they could have just said "no advise or suggestions on my writing is wanted," within the author's notes. 

BLOCKING/UNFRIENDING

Being blocked is no fun. Having been blocked or taken off someone's friend's list without a reason can feel bad and may, in some circumstances, wind up burning your bridges, but this happens. In the past, I've even heard from others about people who acted as friendly as can be to them in a reply or message only to find out that same friendly person blocked or unfriended them later. This can be puzzling, to say the least, but life goes on.

On the other hand, if someone insults you in any way, or you feel their review is too harsh or insulting, you have the right to block them. No one needs that. 

GETTING NO REVIEWS

We each want to know we're not wasting time here. We want to get recognition in some way for what we've done. But despite writing what you think is good, you may not get a lot--or any--reviews. This could be due to several factors. Your writing may not be understandable; the topic may not be interesting; the title may not be catchy enough; the first sentence may not grab the reader; the reviews you've given may have something to do with it, or there could be numerous mistakes in what you've written. 

As for my myself, if I see one obvious mistake, I know they'll be others. If I'm right, I tend to pass it up, knowing it's not going to be a smooth read. But even these points may not be the real reason. Yes, I've wondered why the reviews for something I've written have not been forthcoming also, but I've been fortunate enough to get so many in the past, I don't worry about that anymore. But not getting any response can be disheartening and people have gone elsewhere in the past. In other words, it sucks sometimes and we've got to make the decision to keep at it or move on.  

ALTERNATE ACCOUNTS

Yes, there are people here with more than one account. I've had about three others I rarely use because of problems in the past with stuck friend requests, stuck read requests, stuck messages...etc. People use them for personal reasons I guess. Using them to insult is wrong though. That's where the blocking option comes in. 

FINALLY

If you need help, have a question, or are bothered by something, feel free to ask someone. As a writing community, we need to get along. If you feel the need to block a writer, at least leave them a docile message before doing so. The same with unfriending someone.  

If you like someone's writing, but don't want to review, perhaps it would be better to decline to ask for a friend request. You can always check their page for something new later.

If someone has reviewed you and you'd like to review them back but don't understand their poem or story, send them a message. You could just say you apologize for not reviewing, but you aren't sure you understand what they've written. I've done it before and the result was fine. At times, the language barrier might be a problem.  

As I said initially, this is a great site. A place where you can learn from your mistakes and learn from others. Not everyone is going to be the nicest person, but life is like that wherever you go, isn't it? So don't sweat the small stuff. Write about it if you have to. :)    

Reviews

[Cherrie]

Excellent insight. also I agree this is the best writing site around. I'm creeping up on the 10 year mark and still enjoy getting everyone's input.

[Relic]

Congrats, Cherrie. I think I've been here around the same time. Thanks for the read.

[III]

reading and taking notes. thanks! ^_^

[Relic]

My pleasure. :)

[Kathy Van Kurin]

'NEW WRITERS'
Relic,
This was so affirming to read. A way to share our inner thoughts and feelings and then to review and share again is very healthy for we people. It has to take time to learn how a site like this works and your above step by step explanation was a joy to read. The thing I liked about it was how the points were made in a way which does not insult or place blame but presented ways of understanding how to maneuver this site and to understand its working.
Well, so nice to read your piece.
Blessings,
Kathy

[Relic]

I'm glad you liked it, Kathy. Thanks. :)

[emmajoy]

Reminders like yours are more than welcomg, plus, posting this reminds even me, an oldie of ten years or so, that this is a writing site and that's why we're here, to learn, to share, to lose our best left bits and pieces out in the real world! Many thanks for your common sense, set in stylish but understandable words.

[Relic]

Thank you for the review, emma.

[The Immortal Phoenix]

I am not a new writer, not even new to this site, but i am a reborn writer I seek the new begins of being new. I have learned from my mistakes and now I am back not to hurt but to heal

[Relic]

Good for you, R. Phoenix. Thanks for your thoughts.

[LKBillips]

This is great! Wish you had written this when I first started. Great pointers and very true. WC has been an awesome site for me to get back into writing and I think the crowd here for the most part is accepting and helpful. Another topic that might be good to add is when people send you inbox messages to check out their writing on another site, but have never left you a review. Like the whole I don't know you thing plus they want you to go to their word press account and read their poems there. Doesn't make sense to me but alas somethings never do. Really good write and thanks for posting this!

[Relic]

Ah, yes, the old promotional trick. I recall getting those many years ago. Some people tend to overlook the fact that there's a person who contributed poems of their own and they deserve a look.

Thanks for your thoughts, LK. :)

[Bunni]

Thank you for this. I get so nervous about sharing but the few things I've published have gotten reviews and I've made some friends. Thanks for the tips.

[Relic]

No problem, Bunni. This is one of the best sites to belong to. I wish you continued luck here. :))

[Coyote Poetry]

Great advice shared. W.C had made me a better writer. Many kind folks help me with my editing. We must be kind and assist new writers. Writing, a never-ending place of learning.
Coyote

[Relic]

Absolutely correct, Coyote. Thanks for the review.

[Coyote Poetry]

Was my pleasure and you are welcome my friend.

[barleygirl]

I've been here 2-1/2 years & there have been plenty of these kinds of postings, but this is the best one I've read. I love your friendly attitude. Most who write these are bugged or fed up about things & that comes across as a critical edge. There's none of that in your tone. You sound like you are truly interested in helping newbies get started in good directions here. Good job! (((HUGS))) Fondly, Margie

[Relic]

For those that respond or ask, I always am, Margie. Thanks. :)