NEW WRITERS!

Just some thoughts.

Hello there. If you're a new writer here on this site, I speak for many when I say--welcome. Writers cafe is one of the best writing sites on the web for its ease of use and friendly layout. You have the option to write whatever you want and read whatever writer you'd like. The site also has friendly people. (smiling here). 

My writing has been among those posted for many years but I'm in no way a moderator or "Popular member" asserting my ego. I'm merely here to try and understand and help you.

Let's take a look at some things about the site. 

FRIEND REQUESTS 

If for personal reasons you don't want to get reviews or friend requests, there are options to opt out. But for those that do, read on.   

Writing reviews is a good way to get noticed. It's the foundation for getting reviews on what you've written if that's your goal. A friend request allows you to stay in touch with writers you like and vice-versa if they accept your request. 

Sadly, for years, there has been an annoying tradition for writers to seek a friend request from someone without reviewing him or her first. Why is this annoying? Well, posting a review before sending a friend request makes the writer more confident in returning the favor. Otherwise, they may not know who you are.  

Imagine standing in a restaurant and you get a note from someone saying they'd like to be your friend. How odd would that be? :) But if that same person came up to you and said Nice shoes! You'd feel confident in saying hello to that person again on another day. That may be an odd (and silly) example, but you get the idea. If they decline you, they have their reasons.

If you are hesitant to write a review because you're not confident in your abilities, try looking at what others write and you may get ideas. Even if you have to paraphrase something you read, it may be a good start. Any review that genuinely shares how you feel after reading a poem or story is good as long as you don't try and insult the writer.

If you have no interest in giving reviews, you are free to follow a writer without having to ask for a friend request. If your only motive is to get reviews, that will come off as pretty selfish and disqualify you from any future reviews.  

CRITIQUES

I have learned, improved and appreciated the suggestions from others on how to improve what I've written. Sometimes our mistakes are more evident through someone else's eyes. However, If you don't want advice or suggestions from others to improve what you've written, simply saying so in the author's notes should be enough. I've seen lots of people ignore the suggestions of others when they could have just said "no advise or suggestions on my writing is wanted," within the author's notes. 

BLOCKING/UNFRIENDING

Being blocked is no fun. Having been blocked or taken off someone's friend's list without a reason can feel bad and may, in some circumstances, wind up burning your bridges, but this happens. In the past, I've even heard from others about people who acted as friendly as can be to them in a reply or message only to find out that same friendly person blocked or unfriended them later. This can be puzzling, to say the least, but life goes on.

On the other hand, if someone insults you in any way, or you feel their review is too harsh or insulting, you have the right to block them. No one needs that. 

GETTING NO REVIEWS

We each want to know we're not wasting time here. We want to get recognition in some way for what we've done. But despite writing what you think is good, you may not get a lot--or any--reviews. This could be due to several factors. Your writing may not be understandable; the topic may not be interesting; the title may not be catchy enough; the first sentence may not grab the reader; the reviews you've given may have something to do with it, or there could be numerous mistakes in what you've written. 

As for my myself, if I see one obvious mistake, I know they'll be others. If I'm right, I tend to pass it up, knowing it's not going to be a smooth read. But even these points may not be the real reason. Yes, I've wondered why the reviews for something I've written have not been forthcoming also, but I've been fortunate enough to get so many in the past, I don't worry about that anymore. But not getting any response can be disheartening and people have gone elsewhere in the past. In other words, it sucks sometimes and we've got to make the decision to keep at it or move on.  

ALTERNATE ACCOUNTS

Yes, there are people here with more than one account. I've had about three others I rarely use because of problems in the past with stuck friend requests, stuck read requests, stuck messages...etc. People use them for personal reasons I guess. Using them to insult is wrong though. That's where the blocking option comes in. 

FINALLY

If you need help, have a question, or are bothered by something, feel free to ask someone. As a writing community, we need to get along. If you feel the need to block a writer, at least leave them a docile message before doing so. The same with unfriending someone.  

If you like someone's writing, but don't want to review, perhaps it would be better to decline to ask for a friend request. You can always check their page for something new later.

If someone has reviewed you and you'd like to review them back but don't understand their poem or story, send them a message. You could just say you apologize for not reviewing, but you aren't sure you understand what they've written. I've done it before and the result was fine. At times, the language barrier might be a problem.  

As I said initially, this is a great site. A place where you can learn from your mistakes and learn from others. Not everyone is going to be the nicest person, but life is like that wherever you go, isn't it? So don't sweat the small stuff. Write about it if you have to. :)    

Reviews

[.]

Some great points made here, Relic........

This is a perfect write for the cafe at present; there seems to be a stagnation on the site this year. At least in my opinion. Part of the issue is that there is no tit-for tat, to-and-fro happening much with the newcomers. One can only offer an opportunity once for a newcomer to embrace a friendship and get some more exposure on the site. Alas, many hands are extended, many reviews given.....and nothing is returned in kind. I guess it has to be expected. And i agree; there is nothing worse than to get a friend request, kindly accept it, and wait for some initiation of friendship thereafter, only for the requester to send read requests or just sit idly in one's friend list. Personally, I accept all. Wait for some initiation. If nothing transpires, then I remove them from my friend list. Nothing personal to them, just the way it is for me. Your words are a great guideline for these newcomers. Hopefully it will be read and taken noticed of. For I think the site needs a boost in productivity and an extension of friendly hands. Else it will soon become a ghost town.

An excellent piece of writing for the uninitiated, Relic. Well Done.

[Relic]

Thank you, Doodly. I recently got a friend request recently from someone I've seen here for a while. After accepting, I checked her stats to find over 200 reviews received and none given. So sad.

[.]

Tragic. Hopefully this write of yours helps their understanding.

[Chris Shaw]

I wish you had written this three months ago when I first came to writerscafe. Full of useful information. I've had to learn on a day to day basis, and then not all of it either. Good advice, about not sweating the small stuff. Thank you Relic.

Chris

[Relic]

Thank you, Chris.

[sette]

wow what an informative piece

[Relic]

Thank you, sette.

[Christy the Poetic Hear..]

Thanks so much for writing this. New writers really need this.

[Relic]

Thanks for your thoughts, Lovely Poet.