Time To Take a Breath

If only, if you only knew the reason

For the unexpected immediate change in season

For the predicament and inconvenience that was caused

And the very life you have made on pause

Slowing and hesitating this life in such a manner

Made it difficult to detect and recognize a brand new day

Burning this day in my skull

Made it difficult to reach even for a pull

Almost losing all of my grasps

Not much to latch on to nothing to grab tightly

And in the end, the message is bright and clear 

With plenty to lose but nothing to fear

Even though sometimes with nothing to see

Powerful diligence and perseverance will incite you free. 

Reviews

[Najam Us Saher]

Everyone faces the fear of letting go and losing, this poem inspires them all.

[Joey Nizz]

Thank you for seeing that :)
Thank you for your review also ^^

[Najam Us Saher]

You're welcome :)

[Katelyn Kennedy]

You will truly lose your grasp on life if you go too fast. Sometimes we need to slow down and look around. If you really appreciate it, then your gratitude and hard work will set you free. Nicely spoken.

[Joey Nizz]

Exactly, gotta take things slow and easy.

Thank you for your review :)

[Harley Quinn]

AMAZING! Bravo. Keep it up. Your writing is so great. :) :) :)

[Joey Nizz]

Thank you for thinking that way, I appreciate it ^^

[barleygirl]

Your words are abstract, not drawing a word picture of what this is about. You offer ideas & hints, but it’s not clear how your message relates to me or my life. You do a good job of conveying a sense of excitement and/or stillness. I like a poet using complex words here & there, but the way you do it, I’m not getting your meaning: predicament, inconvenience, difficult, recognize, diligence, perseverance. Words like these make a poem feel cerebral, with something to think about, but I’m not sure what that is. For future writing, I recommend trying some sensory descriptions in your poetry. I think poetry captures people more by FEELING than by THINKING. Try using all the senses to throw your reader right into a situation – how does it feel? How does it sound? How does it taste? Such descriptions can often lighten up a poem where you are offering cerebral principles to think about.

Here’s an example . . . taking your final couplet: “Powerful diligence and perseverance will incite you free” . . . I’ll give you one of many possibilities to change that line so it can be more sensory: “With trickles of sweat washing my brow and a deep growl of passion in my belly, I leap toward the sparkling star of free expression.” Hopefully you will not mind that I’m being a little heavy-handed in my review. Maybe I need another cup of coffee! *smile* Fondly, Margie

[Joey Nizz]

Thank you very much and I appreciate the review and the advice's you have given me, Ill keep them in mind in my next writings, Thank you.

[‘Thoughts In Time..]

Wow wow wow- wonderful - changing of seasons- all within a reason- we accept we grow the heart knows- yes nothing to grasp except the task set out in front- at least you can see what actually sets one free- I know you understand me- just amazing your wisdom and depth- love it🌹

[Joey Nizz]

Im really glad you liked and understood this poem, thank you for your review ^^

[‘Thoughts In Time’🌹]

My pleasure- yes an amazing poem🌹

[Farhan Shaikh]

Very good..and strong words are within..loved it

[Joey Nizz]

Thanks man your reviews are highly appreciated ^^

[Ardra]

Powerful write Joey boy :)
Told you ..you start your motivational class... :))

[Joey Nizz]

Thanks Andra I appreciate you for reading and giving me your views ^^

hehe lets go, Ill make you my assistant :p

[Ardra]

I am not at gud at showing a smiley face.... all the time...
Heheh you need those extra happy... white teeth...shiny hair... assistant....lol :p

[Joey Nizz]

nah nah I will never ask you to be a smiley goody two shoes assistant, I want fear coming out like how cold it is in the arctic :p

Gotta show em fear for respect and to actually pay us attention haha :p

[Ardra]

You lost be between the fear and respect lol
Are we talking about motivational class
Hahah

[Joey Nizz]

haha oh yeah we're gonna motivate the hell out of them x)

[Ardra]

Hahahahhaha..... I like that part. :p

[Joey Nizz]

hahaha :p

Class's in session x)

[Ardra]

:p
Profit sharing required hehehe

[Joey Nizz]

60/40 ? :p

[Ardra]

60 for my idea;) 40 for ur effort lol

[Joey Nizz]

haha fair enough ;p