Flag Pole

Messy metre I know. It was written on a bus. Still unfinished. The 'happy three legs' is a reference to my countries flag- The Three Legs of Mann.

The pole on my castle is bare still today

The flag that once graced it was taken away

No happy three legs filled with pride perfectly

Still faceless and rigid it lasts.

 

And though cold waves crashing on rocks where I stand

Could never cut through this great, wonderous land

Not one thing built solely by man's foolish hand

Could last for all time on these rocks.

Reviews

[Anima Inspired]

An interesting piece. I like the sentiment, and you've got some great phrasing and imagery that really make this come alive. The meter is a little off, but with some slight revision I think it could be easily remedied and made quite wonderful. Nicely written...