Into the looking glass

I run for the lake but as my foot leaves the ground I see a glass barrier over he water.
As I break through glass cuts into my skin I shriek in pain, the water is as cold as ice.
I try to reach the surface but the glass in my skin moves leaving me defenceless.
As I drown a burning sensation fills my lungs and I think about every mistake I've ever made.
I resite a prayer before slipping into darkness.

Author's Note

Please leave constructive criticism.

Reviews

[S.zaynab.kamoonpury]

Wow ice glass like upon the river, perhaps in metaphor. Great muse.


I'm a newbie here like u, pls read my poems but pleez review/comment only my 2nd , my newest poem here, titled "scenery medley contrasts " , wud luv to know your thoughts, Always nice to meet poem pals. And I like to know if my poem is easily understood as intended.