Forever

Kinda thought it would be nice addition to my works.

 

...Forever...

You said "forever" to other girls

And "forever" never happened

But you say it will be different with me

You say we'll last "forever"

But what makes you say that?

I want to last "forever" 

But you always decide "forever" is too long

You say you can't leave me

You say my angelic face holds you here

So you decide on "forever"

"Forever" with my lips against yours'

"Forever" to love me the way I deserve to be loved

...Forever...

 

 

Author's Note

Tell me what you honestly think.

Reviews

[Sean Allen]

This is a good start. Work on it change a word here and there until it is perfect in your own mind and then do it all again. My old time high school english teacher Mr. Smith gave me this advice recently... Revision...Revision...Revision. I am over 60 and he is over 80, but we are still learning and teaching writing.

So read through it over and over, change a word or the tense of a word and see how the meaning changes in your mind.

Example..."You've said "forever" to other girls
And "forever" never happens" This sounds Ok, but if you change the first word to "You" and the last word to "happened" the stanza changes a bit.
Either is OK

[deeps]

Lips can say anything
but the best thing lips can do is kissing
well written and expressed.

[XeRa KrUsE]

I LIKE THAT POEM....WHO IT BOUT?