Plans for my life after death (not a poem, but a very heartfelt musing)

When I die I want to stand on my grave,
6 feet under and 6 feet over.
For a moment I'll be 12 feet tall
and know what it feels like to be giant.
The problem is that I'll be a ghost,
and transparent to everything but animals
and small asthmatic children.
Hey, it would be cool to be a ghost though.
Can't you just imagine the possibilities?
(I think you know where this is going.)
My first stop would be the locker room
of the women's beach volleyball team 
from Brazil.
My second stop would be the locker room
of the women's beach volleyball team 
from Cuba.
My third stop would be.....(you get the idea).
After a couple centuries of this I would probably tire.
(How many perfect bronze asses can a ghost man gape at?)
At this point I would mosey on to Heaven,
and claim my great golden mansion, 
or my fluffy cloud. (Depending on whose version
you believe I suppose.)
I would retire, but just to feel useful
I might take a job in Jesus's bumper sticker factory
printing such classics as;

WWJD?

Christian on board.

In case of rapture car will be unmanned.

(You get the idea.)

Reviews

[April Child]

Laughing out loud... don't forget to be a playful ghost too, swap people's shoes about, draw moustaches on them in permanent marker pens while they sleep, sew up their jacket sleeves. Wow, never thought about the afterlife like that, great thought... but dont wait for heaven, lets grow old disgracefully too ;) Thanks for that smile to start my day off!

[...and some ideas.]

lovely...
as long as there is a "beach", i am translocated...
There is much life in this eventhough it starts with death and grave...ghosts and darkness...
I like it a lot! I lie poems with movements, something that carries you all together to another place.. Bravo!

[Jay Levon]

Hmm, it seems that in movies the kids that see ghost are always sickly and asthmatic

[The White Wolf]

LOL:) Why asthmatic children? Oh, this was classic!