A Cloudy Moon

art ~ Karol Bak

 

~~~

It is gray

when winds of dawn blow from aching rivers

and the roses wither in the mist

as the rain meets the tide

 

It is quiet

when silence speaks and deaf ears hold

only the whisper of the clouds

covering the moon

 

Forgive the clouds

 

as the rain falls upon our golden bed

of lavender scents and pairing birds

and peach blooms rising

like a thousand torches

shining

in the wake of this cloudy moon

 

(rest and hope for this)

 

Yes,

it is gray and it is quiet…

 

Forgive the clouds

~~~

Author's Note

deleted in error and reposted

Reviews

[MAD ENGLISHMAN]

Atmospheric. I liked it but may I make some small observations.
Roses bloom in June onwards, at least in UK. Peaches blossom early spring and lavender june/July onwards. Birds pair in very early spring also. As a gardener I'd notice these things conflicting in your poem. HOWEVER that does not detract from the lovely descriptive flow of the poem. Forgive me the criticism. Mad Englishman

[MsJewel]

Thank you for your suggestions. I live in sunny southern California. My roses and lavender blooms all year long - and the birds are here 12 months a year as well. Although it must be lovely to watch the seasons change - it doesn't happen here... It is sunny and warm and then from time to time a rain shower...Thank you for your lovely comment. I appreciate it very much :) Julie

[MAD ENGLISHMAN]

Since Christmas we've had 45 days of rain here. looking forward to some sunshine.

[MsJewel]

Sending you some California sunshine!

[MAD ENGLISHMAN]

Think it arrived this morning. thanks. They've given minus 7 for tonight. Wet tomorrow and Sunday. AGAIN.

[Gleb Zavlanov]

Wow. I am impressed. This is such a lovely, romantic write. Wonderful words.

[MsJewel]

Thank you Gleb :) Julie

[Trevor Barnett]

Such beautiful imagery here Julie! Some original lines about dreary weather as well. An excellent piece!

[stars are far]

I love love your poems..
Well done "forgive the clouds" i loved this line..AMAZING

[MsJewel]

I'm thrilled you enjoy my scribbles. Thank you! :) julie

[stars are far]

My pleasure dear Julie :)

[emmajoy]

'.. and peach blooms rising ~ like a thousand torches ~ shining ~ in the wake of this cloudy moon ..'

such beautiful phrasing, Julie. This writing is calm and subtle, almost fragile.. very readable, easily memorable.

[MsJewel]

Thank you for your lovely comment :) Julie

[Coyote Poetry]

"Yes,
it is gray and it is quiet…
Forgive the clouds"
I like the gentle tone of the poem. Allowed the reader to feel the thoughts and emotion of the words. Thank you for sharing the excellent poetry. Always a pleasure to read your words.
Coyote

[MsJewel]

Thank you for the lovely comment :) Julie

[Patricia Wedel]

dear Julie... lavender scents and pairing birds...
on a golden bed of peach blossoms.
In Spring, in our town of Fredericksburg, Virginia,
we have the Rappahannock River and streets
lined with Peach blossoms. The clouds for
days have bursts of snow and rain... to
celebrate the arrival of Spring and
Peach blossoms singing opera love
songs... truly touched with moments
of ecstasy's delight. Pat

[MsJewel]

Thank you Pat! Your town sounds lovely! :) Julie

[PurpleQuartz]

So enchanting are your words. You composed them very skillfully!!! I am in awe!

[MsJewel]

You are very kind. Thank you for your lovely comment :) Julie

[MAC]

Julie, this is an amazing write. There is such beauty hidden in imperfection and you bring that front and center in this beautiful piece. Thank you for sharing and for your wonderful reviews.

[MsJewel]

Thank you for your lovely comment and compliment. Have a beautiful day my friend :) Julie