Her Feat

Breathtaking suspense..

Tick-tock, Tick-tock

The clock is ticking

Knock-knock, knock-knock

He is outside my door

Lub-dub, lub-dub,

I hear my heart pounding

Whoosh-whoosh, whoosh-whoosh,

The wind keeps gushing

Thump-thump, thump-thump

The door is about to break

Woo-woo, woo-woo,

The police are coming

Rat-a-tat! Rat-a-tat!

The bullets pierced through me

Bang-bang, bang-bang

My husband still cries at the door

Wuh-uh, ah-uh, wuh-uh

Goodbye my love, I have to go.

Author's Note

Tried something new!
Hope you enjoy this as much as I had while writing it!
Review, rate and share.
Thank you for your time.

Reviews

[sinNsincerity]

I enjoyed the onomatopoeia's in here.

[Jyoti_Ablaze]

Thank you for reading it.

[MelissaAndres]

I liked the rhythm with this. I almost feel like I could actually hear the sounds as I was reading. Good job!

[Jyoti_Ablaze]

Thank you for taking time to read and review my work!

[MelissaAndres]

You're welcome!

[Rajah de AzinPrinz Phyb..]

Nice rythym. "Lub-dub," especially nice touch.

[Jyoti_Ablaze]

Thank you for taking time to read and review my work.

[Isabel]

I can see what you meant by different and how you had fun with it. Very creative! I thought it had an interesting ending. Keep it up!

[Jyoti_Ablaze]

Thank you!

[Francis Orion]

I like this. The story is told in poetic fashion. It flows nicely. Also, I appreciate the dark aspects. Life isn't all gumdrops and rainbows. Thanks for sharing your poems. I look forward to reading more. I love the diversity in them. They aren't all the same. Keep it up! :)

[Jyoti_Ablaze]

Thank you Francis. I like trying different things.

[Francis Orion]

You're Welcome

[Coyote Poetry]

Very nice flow of words. I liked how you led to the good ending. Thank you for sharing the excellent poetry.
Coyote

[Jyoti_Ablaze]

Thank you for the kind review.

[Coyote Poetry]

You are welcome.

[Valentine]

Not my cup of tea today. Give me life and Jesus Christ my Savior. Taking a life is a sin. Valentine

[Jyoti_Ablaze]

Yes it is a sin. And that is why she needed to be stopped.

[Nikunj]

Why did you write this one.it uw the fear of life.remove it.life is to live and to be happy.

[Jyoti_Ablaze]

I know. And I am really trying. Its just that the dark feelings came up from buried past and found voice in the words with fierce imagination. Nothing related to me. Thank you for your concern. Love you, Ma'am.

[Cassie]

I really like this one girl, sounds like a good song that should be sung to nursery going kids

[Jyoti_Ablaze]

Yes but only if the suicide part at the end would be excluded.
Thank you for the sweet review.

[Nahian Bin Asadullah]

Very Simple yet beautiful.

[Jyoti_Ablaze]

Thank you.

[Nahian Bin Asadullah]

You're welcome.