Slow Transition

my first attempt at a pantoum

speaking to my master 

a lesson in no mind

cast away thoughts everlaster

no reality to find

lesson in no mind

where is one to begin?

no reality to find

beyond this cacophony of din

where is one to begin?

lose my mind to pass this test

beyond this cacophony of din

to be better than the rest

lose my mind to pass this test

I need to win this game

to be better than the rest

my ego know's no shame

I need to win this game

'no game,' my master states

my ego know's no shame

I'll be first to the mindless gates

'no game,' my master states

speaking to my master 

I'll be first to the mindless gates

cast away thoughts everlaster

Reviews

[Diane]

Nicely done. I am not sure why, but when I was reading this I was picturing gladiator fighting. Fight to the death sort of thing. In that case I would want to win too.
I really liked this poem. Great Job!

[andrew mitchell]

Definitely the ego is the theme, nicely done kwp

[Davidgeo]

Ego by definition knows no shame, I think. I don't really know, even though I have a lot of both.

Everlaster is a clever word.

[KWP]

I watched a TED vid last night about a guy who made up words - I think it's fair play that I do too X I too have known both ;) happens ...

[Einstein Noodle]

:) i see you ......... i think you should publish a cook book...."The Mindless Chef" food for the soul ;) peace peace peace and love XOX
E.

[Simran Kewlani]

Hey! This is really well written.
Full of something the writer would want to escape.
How have you been?

[HeyJadeXO]

your words are laced with feeling .Wonderful piece thank you for sharing

[wordman]

well girl i think you did a great job on it !

[Ana B.]

There is a saying that goes along these lines: ''When ego dies, the soul awakens''
To me, this poem is about the struggle of ego, when you search for the ''whys'' of life this ego must be obliterated....but of course it's not that easy. I enjoyed the fragrance of your words :)

[emmajoy]

Now that i need to study.. being ignorant as wotsit!

Will read, research, return.. However, in the interim, have absolutely no doubt that you will have created a superbity! (ok, wrong word but... ) Many thanks for your just a minute ago message.. xx) Leaving 90 cos i dont doubt it will be deserved..