The Narrow View

let's see if anyone understands my brain ...

your breath a day old fire burnt tree

you swallow the pain of regret 

gripping at the unwoven tomorrow 

blared sirens, decibels gather volume

reality construct obscures your sight 

evening fog covers your blanketed mind 

in the delusion created

you’ve taken the narrow view my friend 

stop complaining - it’s on you

Reviews

[Fabian G. Franklin]

A myopic view certainly can irritate to distraction. But I've come to believe there are mostly talkers and doers in life. The talkers plan and complain, whine and explain while the doers just roll up their sleeves and get the job done. It's not that complex of a concept. Everyone has a job to do and if everyone did their job we'd all be better off.

[Costa Siwale]

It's a raw and evocative reflection, perhaps on regret or personal reflection about a situation that happened in life. I like the imagery of fire, fog, and sirens, it creates a tense atmosphere, inside and out.

[KWP]

Oh hello Costa - lovely to see you - your feedback is not far of in the very big scheme of things - it's more about how our six senses disrupt and distraction of the perfection of now - we allow ourselves to get caught up in our sense perceptions - to understand this through my words is a big stretch I realise this ... but that was on my mind at the time ...

[Costa Siwale]

Oh, I see, well written my friend.

[Davidgeo]

I don't understand your brain. We have that in common.

Most people think they understand their brain. They have that in common. The unfortunate side effect is large scale poor decision making on a relatively regular basis en masse. Humans are chronically stupid, we should let the wallabies run the show for a while. They have significantly more self awareness than us. Even the big roos, they put us to shame. Humans have not been animaling properly. I have no idea what that had to do with your poem. I'm just venting probably.

You write lovely poems, I wish I was better at critiquing them. My reviews are usually pretty self indulgent due to my d********g personality.

[KWP]

if we put the roos in charge we would have a helluva lot of male mucho bouncing around ..... wallabies could probably run the show ... I thought I saw a couple of whales along the coast yesterday ... I hope I didn't cos that would mean they have come two months early and that can't be good ...

this poem is probably not worth a critique ... but anyway I was crossing it over with my learnings from the Satipatthana Suta, trying to use metaphors again, cos I seem to have forgotten, as well as remind everyone our reality is a mere construct of our brains ...

I read an article today that stated the dark matter in our universe is reducing, they reckon the Big Bang will reduce back into a Big Crunch ... I am wondering how that plays out with what else is beyond that ... thoughts welcome ...

has the cold stopped ?

[Davidgeo]

I don't really know anything about the roos but they look pretty overbuffed and the adults look like jerks. I watched a short video the other day of a large male kangaroo almost luring a person into the water... the person filming was quick to note that this is a common tactic to get animals to approach them in the water so they can drowned them. F****n' kangaroos man... most Americans think they are friendly and social animals. Because we are stupid people. You guys should send us some of your problem roos. It might help with our stupid people problem.