Up Ahead

Trigger Warning: talks about suicide

I thought that we died
When you tried
How are we still alive
And I’m separate
Detached
All alone now

I wish that we died
When you tried
Why am I still alive
I’m detached
All alone
In your home now

I’m lying in bed
In my head
Can’t get out
And I’m wondering why
Am I here
I can’t get out

Can’t get out
Can’t get out
I don’t know where I’m going
Hear me out
Hear me out
I don’t know where I’m going
But I’m gone...

Cause I can’t make it out
Of this mess
Let me go
Just let go now

I miss how it was
In that miserable place
And I’m dying to starve
And I wish I could feel it

I don’t like the taste
Of that miserable place
So I’m starving instead
And I wish I could see it

She’s lying in bed
She’s asleep
She’s at peace
And I don’t know her name
Know her name
Or her story

Is she just a friend
Is she mine
Is she ours
Is she why I’m alive
Why am I still alive now

I’m waiting it out
Cause I can’t
Can’t get out
And I don’t want to live
And I thought it was over
I don’t want to live
Why can’t it be over now

And I can’t get out
Can’t get out
Can’t get out
Cause I know where I’m going
And everything’s dark up ahead

Author's Note

Written by Vienna