Happy at Last!

first story.

 

Why do people stare at me?

 

Am I that different all of them? I walk to my locker and a kid trips me, I fall face first in the hallway.  Another kid

comes up and says "Are you alright?" This time it was a guy voice.  I look up and see an blonde curly haired kid

with ice blue eyes standing over me with a concerned look on his face.  He kneels down and helps me get my

stuff out of the hallway and helps me back up.  He tells me were to go and he looks at my schedule sheet and

tells me that he has the first two blocks with me.  I give a little smile and for the first time that I have ever

transfused to a new school. I was happy. Not to be friends with at guy but a cute, kind, and nice guy. Who I

doubt would hurt a single fly. As we walked people stared as they did before but more surprised than angry. 

Who is this boy that I am walking with. Then it accrued to me that I don't even know his name let alone what he

is interested in. I turn quickly and face in head on and ask "What is your name?" in a sweet yet shy voice. "Oh

sorry forgot about introducing myself, I'm Sylas" as he smiles in a ridicules way. As the days turned to weeks

and the weeks turned to months we started to become best friends. Sylas helped me on my home work and

taught me how to stand up for myself and now that I think about it no one has tripped me for a long time.  All

thanks to Sylas, now that we are best friends know one picks on me anymore. I started to get feelings for Sylas

and it's a strange feeling too. Never felt this way before, feels like  I'm in love with a guy who I have only known

for a few months. But yet it feels as if I have known him my hole life. We share the same taste in books and the

same love for sports but yet something I just can't shake off my mind is that every time a friend of his comes in

the room and talks to him, he just acts like I'm not there. Like something I said was going in one ear and out

the other. His friend stared at me with beady eyes and like clockwork I felt as if, I were back at all the other

school and people didn't ignolage me and never talked to me and I felt alone. Just as I did at my old school, I

wouldn't stand for it, I got up and left and with that so did my love for Sylas.  He got up and told his friend he

would be right back and ran after me. I had left the school grounds crying and when he found me. I was sitting

at the water fountain and had my head in my hands crying. He came up to me and asked "What's wrong?" I

said "Nothing is wrong, just go back to school and leave me alone." But he didn't he sat next to me and

comforted me until I stopped crying and started laughing.  I had thoughts going through my head like "should I

hug him, Should I kiss him, what should I do?" So I desited to  sit and enjoy his company. We skipped school

that day. We were friends as close as can be and we stayed friends, until the day I almost died. It was the

weekend and I had no clue what happened but I was kicked out of the house for the day. So I was walking on

the side of the rode and a drunk driver was coming and at the time I didn't know that he was drunk. So he was

driving fast and the car went out of control and hit me. Luckily before the accident I heard Sylas's voice I looked

back and he was running to ketch up to me. That was when I saw the car, and one second I was standing and

the next I was on my back trying to breath. Sylas came running faster and looked at me on the ground with

tears in his eyes, saying "Raven are you ok? Raven!" He kneeled down and lifted my head on his knees and

kept saying "you’re going to be alright, Raven" over and over again until the ambulance came and even then

Sylas was there saying though words over and over again. I was in too much pain to say "I know I will because

your here." Tears were running down my face as if some part of me thought he was wrong.  Why is this? Why

after so many months of strugling to have a  friend that cares about me. I have to do something stupid

and get myself hit by a car. Not only is my life in danger so is my friendship with Sylas.  I was in the

hospital for a few weeks or so and when I got out  it was like something in Sylas had changed. He had a

girlfriend that totally didn't like me hanging out him and you could see it from a millon miles away, but

Sylas seemed to not notic. That our friendship  was in danger along with his personality.  Why after all

these weeks and months he had to get a girlfriend? Did he miss me although it feels like I never left but

still something just isn't right about his girlfriend. She seems okay but yet I feel as if she is dangerous to

both me and Sylas. So many questions are running through my head and so many answers to be found.

I have so much homework to

catch up on and Sylas is coming over to help my with it sence half of it I wasn't even there to learn. 

The door bell rings and there's Sylas and his girlfriend rapped around him like a monkey. I ask him "what

she was doing here?" and he told me she wanted to come and help so here she is in my living room

snooping around in my house. We go up stairs and I grab Sylas's arm and lead him up and then his

girlfriend(Sarah) grabs his other hand and walks with him.  What does he see in her? I am so mad and

she can tell I am too because she has the idea of leaving and Sylas says," Are you sure you have to

leave so soon?" and she answers in a sweet and quiet voice,"Yes I'm sure I must leave, Thanks for

having me Raven. Bye!"  As she shuts the door behind her. I suppose I should apoligise to her and yet

apart of me wanted Sylas all to myself. So I do nothing but stand their. Until Sylas grabs my arm and

pulls on it and we go up stairs to my room to study. Nothing but silence and then Sylas asks," Are you

ok Raven? You aren't talking as much as you use to, you know before the acident." I look up and smile

at him and don't say a word because I feared that he might her the jelousie in my voice. So I wisper,"I'm

fine" under my breath but loud enough so he could hear me. I wished him happiness I really do but for

some reason I want him to be happy with me and no one else. Why did I care so much about him and

why do I feel all warm inside when he is with me and so cold when someone else is with him? I'm

caught off gard when I hear Sylas ask," Are you jelouse of Sara, Raven?" I feel confused and a little

angry with Sylas. I reply," Jelouse? Why would I be Jelouse?" I hear my voice becoming angrier and yet

a hint of sadness was in my voice as well. All of a sudden my face feels wet as if I were crying but I was

so angry with Sylas and then I feel someone close to me and I look up and it's Sylas and his arms are

rapped around me as if he was comforting me. Then I look closer and see he is crying as well and

says"I was so scared when you were hit I thought I was going to lose my best friend and every night I

would cry myself to sleep and wish that you would get better and wake up. Then a month past and you

woke up and I was so happy that I started to cry. I guess that's why you think I wouldn't hurt a fly? I

missed you so much and I was so scared that I would never hear your voice again, I came to see you

every day to the day that you woke up and saw me standing there by your bed." I was thinking as he

said thoughs words "wake up?" "was I in a coma?" Then I ask him what he ment about me waking up

and stuff I ask "Was I in a coma, Sylas and If so why didn't I know about it?" He thought for awhile and

said,"I don't know. Maybe your parents didn't want you to know about it?" So we think about why I didn't

know about the coma and forget all about the studieing we had to do and the crying that we were in the

middle of and just thought.

Author's Note

Will write more later!

Reviews

[LilyWriter]

This is a great start, and everyone needs to start somewhere. You have left a lot open for development and that is a wonderful thing.

This is very creative.

The things that I would work on is the overall format of your story. Chosing a different format might be easier on the eyes and help the reader flow through your piece.

Double check your spelling and if you need help editing please do not be afraid to ask. I find that if you are typing your story as you are creating it, it helps to print it out and then read it out loud. Listen to how it sounds. If it doesn't sound like a flowing conversation, make notes on how you can make it become so.

I am looking forward to reading your other works. :)

This has potential, please do not give up on it.

[Magdelena]

I read it, found some things wrong, but hey! Who dodesn't on their first draft? Work on the little things, that you can always do! it's the storyline that i look at, is there one? What of the plot.. Things that catch the eye, that's what i look into..

This had it all!!!

Keep working on it. That my tough love message. Nice write. Keep building on the weak.. flow with the strong..




Mag xx

[Jeff Miller]

Great job, keep writing!

[Sean M. Addams]

i think was a very creative piece liked the detail in this alot format was more like a poem but over then that i thought you did great on this...

[Kat24]

Hi,
I disagree with tophatgirl in what she says. I think this is really good. Keep writing. Kat24

[TopHatGirl]

Work. On. Spelling. PLEASE!!!! And punctuation. Remember to use these " ??? " and alos, your sentences are choppy. They need to flow with each other. Your grammar is atrocious and your descriptions are terrible. "A blonde kid with ice blue eyes?" Would you really describe a cute guy like that. I think not. Sorry if I hurt you, but it's called tough love. Consider rewriting this, tell me when you do.