A marriage proposal (metaphorically)

A Persuasion

Dearest Mr. Genius,

 

This longing for the touch of your hand

This overflowing desire for you to hold me

For I know & you know- you do understand

And you know who you’re destined to be

Baby, I know you write your own destiny

 

I’m pleading; I beg you not to give me up

Together we can write a story, up to much

 

I promise you, you’ll find in me a best friend

Our paths run parallel; dearest, we can be one

I’ll stand by all through the strife until the end

Until we find happiness & the battles are won

Baby, if you set your soul free, I can be the one

 

I’m pleading; I beg you not to give me up

Together we can write a story, up to much

 

 

Potentially yours,

An untouched pen

Author's Note

Do you think it can be edited and/or expanded? I'd like to have your interpretations so that I can know if the message is conveyed.

Reviews

[Ghostshell]

I think it's perfect as it is. I really like this: "Our paths run parallel; dearest, we can be one"

[Luke Sampson]

I like it! Made me smile =] your build up lets you know that there is going to be a twist, but you don't quite know so you read on. I thoroughly enjoyed this write! =]

[Daniel DeLorez]

Beautiful. :) Very touching. And I love the ending: "Potentially yours," Very well done... I have nothing to criticize. :) It's absolutely flawless in my opinion.

I've always been big on punctuation, but that's just me. Everyone has their own style, and it doesn't take away from the emotion in the least bit.

[SoulCrusader (Yas)]

I love it as it.....pleading proposal... be very touching and loving :)

[Seshat Nidaba]

I enjoyed this, pleas of the heart always seem so fine!