The Oldest

A Poem by Askew

There is something about being the oldest child
Grandchild
Cousin
Niece
I was the first to bear the weight of expectation
The first to be gifted responsibility
The first to let everyone down
I was practice
A test run
They perfected it with those younger than me
Learned from the mistakes they made with me
The mistakes I made
I was the first
I was supposed to be perfect
I only lived to fulfill
Yet I couldn't
My existence has been a series of disappointing them
And watching them vow to do better with those who come after me
Why am I to blame when they raised me this way?