I Remember

I remember

I remember once I was told I drank too much and he would leave me if I didn't stop, that relationship didn't mean enough for me to stop, so I chose my fifth over him.
I remember once I was told my life was too crazy for him to handle and I needed to calm down, that relationship didn't mean enough for me to stop, so I chose my chaos over him.
I remember once I was told I needed more stability or he would leave, that relationship didn't mean enough for me to stop, so I chose my teetering mountain over him.
I've fallen from grace many times and stared satan in the face, I've danced in hell and had a few shots with fallen angels. I tried to leave and opened the doors to purgatory, I floated with lost souls and held tight to the reigns of the four horsemen, all the while begging my God for forgiveness.
I remember when I woke up alone, covered in sin, I had succumbed to darkness, I was ashamed of my actions all at once.