Frozen Breath

This poem explores the complexities of human disconnection and emotional paralysis ,and the longing for meaning and release.

A breath I'm holding for a long time now,
living a state of partial consciousness,
where I can feel my fingers scribbling and nibbling and my soles waking up in a pool of sweat.
Is my chest moving faster or slower,
Is it viable to be alive like this. Overwhelming voices struck my ear none sweeter enough to stay and heed.
None catches my curiosity apart from you, none feels near and familiar more than you. An intuition that I am you.
I see you play with the wires of your earphones when darkness falls again .
Does this mean being alive, for now I play my favorite song from my phone seeing you from a distance. I want to release my breath now .
But the voices around scare me. Can I just stand and not be frozen. I want to take steps ahead but what's restrains me?

Reviews

[Broken.buddy]

The image of holding breath for a long time is such a perfect metaphor for suspended state of being neither fully alive nor fully
absent - just existing in this liminal space.
I'm particularly struck by "living a state of partial consciousness" - that captures something so specific about depression or
emotional numbness, where you're aware but not fully present, going through motions but not really engaging with life.
The physical details are powerful - "fingers scribbling and nibbling," "soles waking up in a pool of sweat," "Is my chest moving
faster or slower" - they create this sense of being disconnected from your own body, questioning even basic functions.
The connection to another person becomes this anchor point: "None catches my curiosity apart from you, none feels near and
familiar more than you. An intuition that I am you." There's something profound about finding yourself reflected in someone
else when you've lost touch with yourself.
The ending captures that frozen quality perfectly - wanting to move forward, wanting to "release my breath," but being held
back by fear and the overwhelming nature of the world around you.

I like the emotion of thoughts forming inside a frozen space, well written.

[Elizabeth]

this is sooo good i love the dichotomy of the narrator's thoughts