Chapter 1 first half

“The role is complete, all are accounted for, sir.” reported the first man. “Understood, dismissed.” Responded the other man. The first man saluted and began to leave the tent. “Oh and, Coren? Tell Garreth to get a patrol together and have them scout behind us. I don’t want them sneaking up on us.” commanded the other man. “I’ll let him know.” The other man sat back and sighed while he enjoyed some peace. He took a sip of a warm concoction, a mixture of heated milk, vanilla, and sugar. The man stood up and went over to a jar filled with a sweet brown liquid and frowned. “I’ll need to get some more vanilla at the next stop.” He said to himself. He went back over to sit back down when someone poked his head in the tent. “Lockehart?” Dale got startled spilling the hot beverage all over his leggings.

He cursed in surprise and set down the cup. “Oh! So sorry sir! I should have rung the bell. Are you alright?” asked a man who had poked his head into the tent. “Ha! I’m fine Caldor don’t feel so bad. Can you see if Menstead has an extra pair of leathers?” requested Dale. “Right away.” Caldor took his head out of the tent and left.

Awhile later he returned and gave Dale the pants. After putting on the new pants, Dale strapped his sword to his belt and left the tent. Dale looked around and saw his eighteen men, three of which that were heading off on patrol. From what he saw, it was the Marksten brothers, Garreth and Faelon, and Adrian Mortain who was the newest to the warband. A loud bark of laughter was heard from the cooking tent, drawing the attention of almost the entire warband and probably every animal in a two mile radius. Fortunately it was just Erik Atill, the cook. “I swear he’s going to cause me a heart attack someday.” Muttered Merton, their medic. “He must be talking to Haldor.” Guessed Dale. “Who else?” grumbled Merton.  

 

 

Later, Dale was at the fire getting the supper ration from Erik. “How’s day been Erik?” Dale inquired even though it probably meant a berating. “Oh, like usual. You know EVERYONE HAS TO COMPLAIN! Oh…he wants this but not that…oh and he wants that but not this…It drives me crazy! Every time I cook too! Do they even have any idea what it’s like to cook for eighteen hungry soldiers!? I mean give me a break!” Dale slowly walked away with his ration, leaving the next guy Ackus Tulus to the rant.

Dale sat down next to Marcus and began to eat the roast fowl and onion. “You need more room?” asked Marcus scooting over. “Ah, It’s alright, I’m fine.” Dale said “Oh alright, you just looked cramped.” Marcus replied hospitably. “I’m good but you have my thanks.”

Dale finished the meal and started to head for his tent. “Night, Lockehart.” Marcus said.

 

 

Garreth crouched down to look at the footprint. “They’ve been here that’s for sure. I’d say they’re not far too.” Faelon looked up from inspecting his dagger. “How d’ yah know?” Garreth looked at his younger brother. “I’m the tracker, I know my stuff. Now let us continue.” The three of them headed off following the tracks. They continued awhile, with Adrian humming a tune. Eventually Faelon got annoyed by the tune. “Will you hush that godforsaken noise,” He said critically “I mean it’s getti-“ Garreth shushed the two. “Look.” He whispered.

There were twenty of them, there was supposed to be thirty. “Hum hum, there’s only twenty…” Garreth informed. “Wait then where are the others there should be ten more shouldn’t there?” Adrian stated. “If…we knew… WE WOULD TELL YOU!”Faelon whispered loudly. Garreth looked at them both with a disapproving stare. Faelon quieted down, embarrassed. He looked around to see if anyone else had heard him. Fortunately no one had. Except now his brother and commanding officer was mad at him, for the second time that night.    

Garreth wished he was with his captain, he didn’t like not being able to protect Dale when there were enemies after them, especially if there were some missing. “Alright, let us report in.” Garreth announced after a couple hours watching the enemy encampment. The three of them stood up to leave, popping backs and stretching. Faelon and Adrian continued to stare at each other with murderous glares. After a few minutes of stretching they moved back towards the camp.

 

 

Dale Lockehart woke up to the smell of one of his men fixing him some ambrosia, as he called his vanilla drink. He stood up and slid on a shirt and put a padded leather jerkin over it. Dale then walked into the public part of his tent attaching his sword as he walked to get a cup of the drink. “G’ mornin’ capn’.” Said the soldier. “Morning Lawrence, hey grab yourself a cup of ambrosia before you leave.” Dale replied cheerfully “Alright, thanks. You’ve always been good to us captain.” Dale took a sip of his drink and responded “Well I look at all of you as friends so I don’t want to be too harsh.”  

Awhile later Garreth and the patrol returned. They grabbed themselves some hardtack and water and headed for Dale’s tent.

“Come in.” Dale said having heard the ring of the bell outside his tent. Garreth walked in. “Ah Garreth back from patrol I see. So what did you find?” Dale asked. “Well we saw twenty we didn’t see the other ten.” Garreth reported. Dale took a sip of ambrosia and thought for a moment. “Did they look exhausted? Taxed? Like they had been in a bout recently?” Dale asked inquisitively. “No, they seemed in good health.” Dale sat back and thought. “Grab a drink and let me think for a moment corporal.” Dale said. Dale thought to himself. If they weren’t in a battle and ten men were missing then something had to be going on. Of course he couldn’t think of why they would split up their forces so significantly. “Ah, you’re dismissed I might be a while.” Garreth looked up startled by the break in the silence. “Sir.” Garreth saluted and left.

 

 

Marten was waxing his crossbow string when he caught movement in the tree line. He put his foot in the stirrup and slowly slid back the string of his crossbow. He looked around while he loaded a bolt. He started to stand up but quickly sat down when an arrow slammed into the tree eight inches above his head. “ATTACK WE ARE UNDER ATTACK!” Marten yelled running into the middle of the camp, startling the other soldiers.

 

 

Roken heard the yells while sharpening one of the extra swords. He stood up and walked out of the tent holding the sword. He saw thirty plus men stepping out of the tree line, some had bows. Roken ran into the tent and picked up a shield and headed back outside. He saw Haldor run past him holding his vicious double headed battle axe. 

 

 

Caldor was practicing with his bow when he heard the shouts. “What the-?” He began to say something when an arrow slammed into a mug of water near him. He grabbed his quiver and ran toward the shouts as he fixed the quiver to his waist.

Caldor ran into Marten after navigating between rocks, tents, and trees. “What, is going on?!” Caldor demanded. “They’re here! Our pursuers are attacking!” Marten informed. “We can take em’!” Caldor said optimistically. “Where are they?” Caldor asked. “That way.” Marten pointed in the direction he had come. Caldor nocked an arrow and ran in the direction Marten had pointed.

 

 

Garreth heard the shouts while he was finishing his breakfast. His first thought was to go and protect Dale but he knew he’d be of better use somewhere else. He ran up to a nearby tree and climbed it. From there he could see the attackers approaching from the west. “FROM THE WEST!” Garreth yelled, informing the camp. Garreth saw the rest of the warband putting on their helmets and attaching swords or picking up spears. He saw Caldor talking to Marten who was pointing in direction of the enemy. Garreth returned his attention to the enemy and loaded his crossbow.

 

 

Coren was napping when the shouts startled him from his nap. He fell off the log he was on and stood up with his sword drawn. “ATTACK!” Coren heard. It sounded like Marten. Coren put on his helmet and strapped on his shield. “FROM THE WEST!” Coren heard Garreth shouting. He headed in that direction.

 

 

Dale heard the shouting while reading over food stocks. There was no hesitation, he stood up and grabbed his armor. He put on the chainmail hauberk and slid the leather reinforced surcoat over that. He then put the hood of the surcoat over his head and put on his chainmail coif and helmet. He ran out the tent grabbing his crossbow and bolts on the way. “FROM THE WEST!” Dale heard while he was attaching his bolt pouch to his belt. Dale loaded his crossbow and ran west.

He arrived with Roken and Caldor. Haldor was already there, taunting the enemy. The enemy was in range so Caldor raised his bow and fired. The arrow slammed into an enemy’s right lung. He grabbed his breast and coughed up blood. He fell over mortally wounded. Dale lifted his crossbow, aimed, and fired. The bolt hit home, piercing the man’s left jaw. The man fell over yelling. Haldor rushed forward going for an under swing. The blow slammed into the opponent’s left leg just above the knee. The leg was severed, the man fell over screaming. Haldor finished the enemy off with a crushing blow to the chest, killing him instantly. Caldor fired another arrow that slammed into an enemy archer’s throat. The man grabbed at his throat and fell back gurgling before dying. Caldor drew his sword and charged into the fray quickly dodging a thrust from an enemy spear. Caldor then chopped off the head of the spear and quickly followed through with an upward stab to the chest. The man dropped his spear, tried to grab the blade of the sword and slid off the blade, dead.

By this time the rest of the camp started arriving. Coren charged into the scene and blocked an arrow with his shield. He charged into one soldier hitting him with the hilt of the sword. The soldier spit out blood and teeth. He raised his sword to block but it was too late, the edge of Coren’s shield slammed into the man’s neck. Coren finished him off with a decapitating slash.

Dale drew his sword and shield and charged into the fray. An enemy soldier stepped in Dale’s path. The soldier tried an overhead strike but Dale blocked it with his shield. Dale kneed the man in the stomach. The enemy grabbed his abdomen giving Dale an opening to kill him with a thrust to the chest. The guy tried to shout in pain but ended up coughing up blood, he grunted and the light in his eyes went out. Dale withdrew the blade and kicked the man over.

Garreth knocked his third arrow and fired at an enemy trying to flank Lawrence. The arrow slammed into the man’s back. He tried to throw his sword at Lawrence before he died but ended up dropping it. Garreth loaded another arrow and fired at the last enemy archer. The arrow slammed into his thigh. He screamed and fell over.

Caldor was on his third victim. The man raised his club to block a strike that turned out to be a feint. He looked down with a grimace to find a sword in his stomach.

The beard of Haldor’s axe hooked an enemy spear. With a tug Haldor ripped the spear from the man’s grasp. He followed through with a blow to the stomach. Haldor withdrew the axe, the man grabbed at his remaining entrails but lost the battle and fell dead. Haldor turned to his left which saved his arm, a sword slash that would have cut deep into his left arm ended up grazing his chest. The wound wasn’t bad but it stung. Haldor kicked the man in the knee.There was an audible snap as the knee popped out of place. Haldor took the chance to split the man’s skull. There was a crack and the man fell over, dead before he hit the ground. Haldor spit on the corpse and ran off for his next kill.

By this time there were around twelve enemies left. They were staring to route. One last straggler was killed by a crossbow bolt and an arrow slamming into his back simultaneously.

“All right men how bout you five, Haldor, Caldor, Faelon, Tasir, and Adrian go to collect the bodies and burn them. The rest of you pack up camp or go see Merton for medical attention. We have been here too long as it is.” Dale commanded. Haldor was using a dead enemy’s shirt to clean of the bits of enemies on his axe.

Erik was talking to his son Roken. “You alright son?” Roken looked at his dad with a face of mock offense. “I’m fine father.” Erik looked at his son. “Well alright I just didn’t want my son to be injured.”

Garreth climbed down from the tree to go fetch any reusable arrows. He waved to Tasir, one of the crossbowmen, on his way. Tasir looked up and nodded and went back to piling bodies. “You know you can talk right?” Garreth said sarcastically. Tasir looked up in with a look of annoyance. His brother ran up to him. “So how many did you kill brother?” Faelon asked. “Four and I injured another.” Faelon looked at him grinning. “What?” Garreth asked suspiciously. “I killed five.” Garreth grunted in disappointment and handed Faelon a small purse of coin. Faelon walked away to celebrate.

Dale walked into the medical tent. He saw Ackus being treated. He had broken two fingers when the flat side of a sword hit his hand. “I SAID IT’S NOTHIN’ NOW GET YER ‘ANDS OFF MEH!” Dale looked back to see Lawrence, Alexander, and Coren carrying Haldor into the medical tent. Haldor grabbed Lawrence and shoved him out of the tent. “You need to have that wound checked.” Coren commanded. “I said I’m FINE!” Haldor growled at him. “Haldor just let Merton check the wound.” Dale said tiredly. Haldor looked over at Dale and sighed. “Fine.”  

Dale left the tent. The sky was significantly darker. “It’ll be raining soon.” Dale muttered. The first heavy drops splashed onto his head. “Or now…”

The band finished pack as the downpour really started. “Well this will bet a damper on my day.” Faelon says grinning. Garreth stares at him with a frown. “Ohhh… Hahah, very funny. But really cut it.” Garreth demanded. “You be quiet, you’re the one who is supposed to be quiet anyway.” Dale walks over, angry. “Alright, both of you hand over five denarium and stop this fighting this is immature and we got to go.” They handed over the coin and went to their horses.

 

 

It had been raining for upon three hours now. Coren rides up to Dale. “Dale! We have to set camp! The ground is too soft! The horses’ feet will sink into the mud! If we don’t stop a horse is going to hurt its leg and throw its rider!” Coren yelled over the wind and rain. Dale looked at Coren with a sense of anxiety. “No! If we stop and set camp we might damage equipment!” Coren looked at Dale with a sense of nervousness. “If a horse throws a rider in this weather it could startle the other horses… that’s how we lost Tharon!” Dale looked around at the band with an impression of unease. “Very well let it be! EVERYONE WE STOP FOR CAMP HERE!” A crackle of thunder followed.

The band promptly dismounted seemingly relieved. Many of the band removed armor and stripped down to their trousers and stuck their clothes in water tight areas. “It’s cold I can’t stand  this rain!” One band member shivered. “Well you can put your shirt back on and let it mold on you if you want, Roken!”

 

 

After about two hours the camp had been set up. The extra tents were used as ground tarps for the tents. Dale walked into his tent and grabbed a towel. He dried himself  off and grabbed put on some dry clothes. He went to his pack and pulled out two bottles. “Oy, Coren!” Dale yelled. Coren ran into the tent. “You called?” Coren inquired. “Ah, yes. Have these rationed out to the men.” Dale handed Coren the bottles after pouring himself some. “Firewater? This is some strong stuff you sure you want to up and pass it out to the men? Sixteen drunken, wet, cold soldiers is not something pleasant. “Yes, but the firewater should warm their stomachs and deal with the cold part.” Dale reassured him. “Very well, whatever you say sir.” Coren left the tent.

Dale lied down on his bedroll and grabbed a book and candle and began to read. He took a sip of the firewater. The drink burned his throat going down. He coughed. “Heuh…wow strong stuff.” The sip settled in his stomach like a small ember. “Ahhh..that’s better.” He took another sip and sighed, opening his book.

 

 

A few hours later Dale opened his pack and pulled out his pack of meal mix, a mixture of dried apples, carrots, corn, and bread a ration issued to the men to eat on days when food could not be prepared. He finished the little roll and laid back and fell asleep to the pitter patter of rain on the tent.

 

 

Garreth and Faelon were arguing quietly in their tent. “It doesn’t matter. It was mine I bought it! You had no right to take it.” Garreth whispered. “Well I was still hungry and you weren’t eating it!” Faelon whispered back. “I had that sweet roll prepared by Erik it cost me my entire weekly earnings.” Garreth whispered. “Well, have another one made then!” Faelon growled. “Argh, I’m goin to bed.” Garreth rolled over turning his back to his brother. “Oh just backing out now are yah?” Faelon asked victoriously. “Snore snore…I’m asleep I can’t hear you…” Garreth said now annoyed “Heh I win!” Faelon whispered. “No yah didn’t this argument is on hold… now go to bed.” They heard Haldor shout from the neighboring tent. “Shut up or the devil take yeh some of us are tryin the sleep here!” The shout was answered by a shout from Faelon. “Yeah?! You’re not helping Haldor!” Garreth was about to say something when they hear another shout from Coren. “You guys have woken up the entire camp! NOW SHUT UP AND GO TO SLEEP OR YOUR SLEEPING IN THE RAIN!” Faelon cursed he knew that all three of them would have to put up with grumpy comrades in the morning. “Look what you did now.” Garreth whispered. “As I recall you played a part too.” Garreth stood up and grabbed his heavy weather robe. “Where are you going?” Faelon asked. “Someplace I can get some sleep.” Garreth walked out of the tent. He grabbed Faelon’s shield from the side of the tent. “If he is going to mistreat it then he shouldn’t mind if I use it.” Garreth whispered to himself. He held the shield over his head as he walked over to the tree line. He selected a good tree and climbed up it. Garreth donned the robe and hung the shield up on the branches above him the protect his face from the rain. Garreth laid down to go to sleep.

 

 

Garreth woke up to the morning bell. It felt like he had gotten an hour of sleep. “Uhhh…” Garreth groaned as he sat up. The day looked like it would be sunny.  He grabbed the shield and removed the robe. Garreth proceeded to climb down the tree. He walked back to the tent and shoved the shield in his brother’s face startling him as he got out of the tent. Garreth went off to grab his morning meal. Erik looked at him grouchily as he gave him his ration. Garreth noticed it was reduced. He would go hungry today. As he finished his meal Marten came up to him. “Yes Marten?”  Garreth asked. “Dale wants to see you in his tent.” Marten informed. Garreth gave a nod. “I’ll go to him now.” Garreth got up and headed for the tent. He arrived in front of the tent and adjusted his clothes to be more presentable. He walked in. The first thing he noticed was Faelon and Haldor. So it was about last night. “Sir!” Garreth saluted. “Ah you’re here. Alright. So I heard there was an argume-“ Faelon interrupted. “Sir! With all respects it was my brother’s fault he started it.” Dale turned to Faelon. “DO NOT INTERRUPT ME!” Dale shouted, startling Faelon. He knew he had just made Dale mad. No easy feat and not a good one either. Dale continued in a slow, quiet ,frightening voice. “I don’t care whose fault it is…All three of you had a part…all THREE of you will have a punishment.” Haldor shifted nervously. He knew it would be foolish to say anything if Dale was like this. “Faelon you will be washing dishes for the next week.” Faelon nodded. “Haldor… You will be organizing supplies for the next four days.” Dale turned to Garreth. “And you will be cleaning the horses’ waste for the next four days.” Dale turned to look at Faelon and Haldor. “You two are dismissed to your duties.” Haldor and Faelon touch their fists to their hearts in salute and walk off. Dale returned his gaze to Garreth. “I expect better from someone like you. You have been in this group almost as long as Coren or Erik. If Faelon becomes too much of a trouble I can have him dismissed from the group.” Garreth looked up at Dale. “That shouldn’t be required sir. I take responsibility for his actions sir.” Dale looked at Garreth with surprise. Dale smiled. “You know I don’t like being called ‘sir’ we are equal in this company. We aren’t under Raelen anymore.” Garreth looked at him and smiled. “Yeah slavery that was.”  They both laughed gently. “Ah we better get everyone on the move, it’ll be hot today better get as many miles in as possible before it heats up.” Garreth stared at him. Dale noticed the stare. “What-what is it?” Garreth smiled. “Your just in a hurry to replenish that supply of…ambrosia. Admit it we both know it’s true.” Dale laughed. “You caught me.” Garreth saluted. “I’ll tell them to get ready to move. Fixed march or walk?” Garreth asked. Dale replied, “No need to march it’s not like we are putting on a display for a king.” Garreth saluted and left.

 

 

Erik wiped the sweat off his brow. “It’s bloody hot today. It isn’t even midday yet and I am exhausted.” Haldor turned his head to look at Erik. “It’ll only get hotter as the day progresses.” Haldor responded. “That is why it is so terrible. I already feel like I’ve been walking all day…” Erik complained. Garreth rode up to them on his horse. “Erik you always complain…soon we might have to find a new cook…” Garreth interjected. Erik stared at him. “Does the heat not faze you?” Garreth looked stared at Erik. “No…I just don’t complain.” Garreth teased. Erik stared at him gravely. “You keep talking and you’ll be having bad bowel movements at dinner.” Erik threatened. Garreth laughed and rode on ahead to tease someone else. “Argh! He is so mean sometimes.” Erik complained. “I heard that!” Garreth yelled from up the line.

 

           

 

 

Author's Note

first half of chapter 1, rough draft

Reviews

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if the aim is to reel in the typical reader, perhaps tired from a day at work, then the introduction of each character might have to be slower. My advice (could be wrong!) is to spend the first chapter devoted to one character, to get the reader emotionally invested and interested in the world and people around him. It seems as if it is too much, too fast, and that might compel the reader to put down the book.
Though it probably is first draft, keep in mind that the less words you can use to describe the same thing, is almost always the better way to do it (there are always exceptions)
Good luck!