Two Damn Midget Aliens (Conclusion)

“Oh my gawd,” Jake whispered. There it sat, still the same: slimy, translucent and squirmy. It wiggled around, then, slowly moved toward Jake.

Two Damn Midget Aliens (Conclusion)

 

 

                No one knew how old the interstellar ‘Sludge Barge’ where the tube crawlers worked just that it was ‘ancient’ and built by the so-called ‘midget aliens’ because everything in it was short, small, and low.  All the tube crawlers like Jake knew for sure was that the pay was pretty good for crawling about in the tubes and fixing problems that crop up. Because of the ‘sludge barge’s’ mysterious history, myths arose among the workers like the one where ‘way back when’ a tube crawler worker met an alien got his head ripped off and was drained of his blood. The veteran tube crawlers thought the myth was a joking matter, but? Now, Jake had actually seen one of the slimy disgusting aliens and luckily had a portal closed between him and it. But what happens if his untrustworthy supervisor opens the portal?

                Jake had always wondered back on volatile Earth what he would do if caught in a terrorist hostage situation. He had immediately avowed back then that he would fight to the death and not become prey to the hostage takers’ whims, agenda, or time schedule.

Now that Jake had seen one of these nasty, monstrous aliens he ascertained that they were real terrorists, albeit slimy man-eating ones, but apparently as deadly as any earthbound terrorists. He just couldn’t sit around waiting until his air had expired to suffocate in a slow gagging agony, because he had just witnessed that awful feeling. He could linger there in the tube until the monsters slithered down the tube to eat him, or  he could end up fighting them somehow with a dwindling air supply�"three definite unviable options.

SO. Go out fighting. Yep! Head held high, chin up with gritted teeth, balls to the wall, full-on to his ultimate ominous end.  Jake understood his destiny, his fate fully now. But meeting and taking on that slimy disgusting thing head on? Not at all like facing and taking on a gun-toting terrorist, so he had to plan accordingly.

Sliding his bandolier tool belt down into his lap, he re-inventoried his tools in preparation of his premeditated attack. His eyes nervously followed the tube toward the portal a bit paranoid after thinking another was stalking him. Then, he nervously eyed his air supply indicator: in the green, 93% remained.  

In order, he checked the belt’s pockets: spanner clamps�"worthless, the Gizmo Tool�"a necessary item to open portals but worthless in a battle�"the laser cutter/burner�"Jake recalled the vision of Cody cutting his hand off with the laser. The laser’s a good close-range weapon if used masterfully, not like Careless Crazy Cody. What’s this? He withdrew an orange handheld electronic device he was unfamiliar with. This wasn’t a tool a tube crawler would normally use.  Did Joe mention this when he inventory his belt? Jake shrugged to himself not recalling that at all.

The device had a rectangular case with two metal prongs sticking out, not unlike his analyzer. It had a thick rubber-coated handgrip with a trigger. Hmmm? Jake pondered that set up. Jake carefully turned the device over ensuring his fingers didn’t touch the trigger. Thinking back, he didn’t recall anything in his rookie tube crawler training mentioning this thing way back when  or even ever needing anything other than what they normally carried.

Behind the grip there was a embossed identification plate. He read “Nerve Neutralizer/ Biological Disrupter, Model 2BDED’ and a long serial number, followed by the manufacturer ‘Neal, Inc., Lunar Rodent Eradication Industries.   

Why is this in here?  Jake wondered. Joe! You SOB, what did you really know? Well, this is the answer to my premeditated attack on that thing! He held the device by the grip, slowly turning it about and examining it from all angles.  He noticed it had a status indicator light above the grip.

“Yep! This sucker might do the job, but I had better see what it does before taking on that slimy alien�"thing.”

On his knees facing down the tube, he braced on one arm, and he held the device out at arm’s length with the other like he remembered doing as a child holding the .22 pistol on the streets of decrepit 2053 San Francisco. This thing was no firearm.  He shrugged in the dim silence, tensed his arm as if there was possible recoil, squinted one eye in anticipation while aiming the best he could, and slowly squeezed the trigger.

“ZZZZZZZAAAPPP! BAAAM!” A lightning bolt shot out, struck the tube some distance away, ricocheted off aside, and dissipated in a flash. The device whined as the status light flashed yellow.

“WHOA BABY!” Jake exclaimed admiring the device. “No wonder Joe kept this thing hidden way, the boys would’ve had a ball with this thing�"no, we would’ve killed each other,” Jake ascetically reflected.

Jake had floating flashes of white in his vision; he blinked repeatedly trying to clear them. Need a pair of goggles for this thing. Ah yeah, he thought reaching up above his helmet’s mask, the fold-down laser shield built into the helmet.

He immediately lost all sense of wonderment of the device scanning down the tube and then the device in his hand.

“Yep! This is all I got. It has to do the deed or�".”   

In preparation, Jake decided wearing the tool belt like a bandolier in this case gave him confidence like a gladiator’s shroud from ancient times, even though he thought there was a reason they wore them�"protection against sword penetration? Jake hadn’t a clue, but nevertheless he folded the bandolier over his shoulder, drew it across his waist and cinched it down.  Then he tightened them again hard to bolster his confidence. He shoved the Gizmo back in its pocket, pushed the cuter/burner laser down, and the clamps would he need them? He put them in too, might as well go fully loaded, eh, because you never know.  He picked up the device “zapper” and hefted it again, aimed it at the empty air canister lying nearby.  Jake had an inspiration. He stepped over, picked up the canister, and stuck it in the bandolier as well.

The radio scratching in his ears annoyed Jake now that he had roused himself in a life-imperiling undertaking. He still could hear snatches of words and bits of phrases over the radio, but he couldn’t quite make it out to get the gist of what was being said. He focused and listened more closely�"the radio went dead again. Jake sighed, took in a deep breath and looked at his air supply indicator 84%. A couple hours of air left to do what? Wait? Nah, I got to face that thing and take it out! He began crawling back to the portal but found he couldn’t with the device in his hand, so he stowed it in an easy to reach pocket where he could grab it if necessary. He gallantly crawled onward to make history of this damn sludge barge by taking out a damn alien. He more or less confidently crawled along as confidently one could do on hands and knees attesting to the fact that the stance is a compromising and exposed position like groveling before conquerors on hands and knees.

The portal came into view in his dim headlamp light around the edge of the last tight curve. The portal was still closed and intact which meant the creature didn’t break through nor Joe had opened it to let it loose.  He wondered how his conscript mates were getting along. Were they as brave as he? There were no more screams for help since Cody’s so maybe the aliens were confined for now. He drew up to the portal and listened closely. There was no noise of activity. He withdrew his Gizmo. Holding it up and stabbing the condition icon green appeared�"green? It was yellow when that alien was present was it gone now?

The radio loudly and obnoxiously scratched into life again, but no voices could be made out in the static. He had a shock and turned about to shine the light about sweeping the length of tube behind him. Nothing there, just jumpy.  He turned the radio off and formulated  his attack plan.

Facing the portal, h

Facing the portal, Jake sat on his butt, set the Gizmo in his lap, pulled out the device and the empty air canister. Steeling himself he aimed the device low, where he thought the alien might be while he glanced down and stabbed the open portal icon�"nothing! The portal didn’t open. Of course, idiot they’re all locked down!  Well, I’m ready to take it on and take it on I will!

He rummaged around in his gladiator bandolier to find the laser cutter burner. He didn’t want to end up like Cody missing a hand or something else, but he was confident that he was more careful than crazy Cody. He lit off the laser, adjusted the beam for a tight cutting pattern, and set to burning a hole in the portal.

Just as Jake began cutting the initial hole, the portal opened on its own. Surprising the hell out of Jake!

Jake froze. “Oh my gawd,” Jake whispered scanning the open tube. There it sat, still the same: slimy, translucent and squirmy. It wiggled around and moved slowly toward Jake. Frightfully, Jake crawled backwards away from the thing as fast as he could. He suddenly came to the realization that he couldn’t kill this thing by crawling away. Moving back toward the alien, he grabbed the air canister and tossed it at the alien. Clink, clinky, clink. It rolled near the alien but not against it. Jake quickly drew up the device and fired.

“KAAAZAAAAAAAAP!” His un-aimed lightning bolt missed by a meter! Blobs of white danced before his eyes. S**t and damn! Come on Jake get your head out of your a*s. The device recharged with a whine as the alien squirmed toward him. The device stopped its whine and the green ready light flashed on. This time he took careful aim right at the alien; he squeezed the trigger.

“KAAAAZAAAAP!” This bolt hit the alien head on. He heard a sizzle and a cloud of steam rose from the hit. As he watched, the alien simply stopped moving, bursting and then deflating like a punctured beach ball. Multi-colored thick goo oozed onto the tube floor. Just like verminage. Slimy goo splattered the tube walls.  Jake smiled widely proud of himself. Jake felt just like the gladiators of old, defeating the ugly invaders after finding a way to stop them. He watched closely to confirm the creature was as dead as a doornail, but seeing it was as flat as a pancake with no shape whatsoever he confirmed it was very completely dead.

Ready to announce his victory, Jake turned the radio back on, but it squawked loudly before he could turn it down.  A clear, loud voice came across the radio.

“Attention all tube crawlers, all tube crawlers, the portals are now in your control, they are unlocked. Please return to your duty section.”

“No s**t Sherlock, Jake said aloud. “Hey everyone I got one them ugly slimy things. I killed it dead!”

Jake thought it odd that no one replied congratulating him as the mighty gladiator and the fact that he was sure he heard snickering in the background. What’s going on out there?

“Jake, Jake!” This is Joe. Sorry, you mustn’t gotten the word. Those slimy larvae creatures are harmless to us. They are food for the alien shipbuilders being born right now. How great is that?!”

Jake eyed the pile of slime that lay there on the other side of the portal. A wisp of steam still rose from the inert so-called harmless larvae.  Jake considered that he hadn’t thought it looked so harmless when it was rushing him. Anyway, he knew he had to say something to Joe.

“Well. WELL. I didn’t know what it was and it was�"it was UGLY and coming for me!” Jake said in his defense. He began putting his laser and the device away in his bandolier.

An unidentified voice spoke up on the radio. “Ha. Ha! Those things are SOOOO dangerous! Woo, woo!” That was followed by rounds of laughter and hoots.

“Yeah, it’s like, like shooting, ah, ah shooting sushi on a dinner plate, ha, ha!” More raucous laughter.

“Sorry about that Jake,” it was Joe. “Anyway, one of the guys found an alien baby, so don’t shoot if you see something about a foot tall, waddling like a duck, and is blue and fuzzy!”

“Blue and fuzzy?”

“Yep! We had no idea except that the birthing time was finally coming up after ten years wait. We fired up the old alien archive computers, but it killed the ship’s power including the comm. We busted are butts to get ‘er up and running again. Sorry about that. We had to work fast ‘cuz some of the guys were running low on air and Cody�".

“How IS Cody,” Jake interrupted.

“He is okay, actually,” Joe said. “Made it back under his own steam and brought his cut off hand with him which was a bit gross. The surgeon is preparing to reattach Cody’s hand and is rather confident that Cody may even be able to use it again. What a brave hero�"just like the epic heroes of old.”

“Yeah,” Jake said, under his breath, “like a gladiator.”  He raised his voice. “Hey, give him my best.”

I’ll never live this down thought Jake as he turned away from the slimy mess and began his long crawl back to his work center.  He had a long crawl ahead to fume and get over his anxiety and irritation. Plodding on with his head down, he came around a curve and heard a strange noise up ahead. There a meter away was a midget alien more or less how Joe had described.

The alien waddled toward him without any fear. Oh, damn what kind of thing are these aliens anyway. He inched up toward it. The bright blue alien didn’t slow its waddling toward him.  Jake didn’t trust what Joe had said not knowing for sure if this thing maybe DID have razor sharp jaws hidden under that blue fuzzy exterior. He reached out toward it. It suddenly lurched at him.

YOW! Jake rolled back away withdrawing his hand and going for the zapper device. The fuzzy alien came closer as Jake stumbled back on hands and knees spider-like. Not daunted by his retreat the alien kept coming faster than Jake could move away. He wondered when this thing would attack. It reached his foot, then his leg and began rubbing on it and purring like a cat. Jake checked both directions down the tube to see if a straggling tube crawler might oversee his embarrassing interaction with the alien.

“CRAP and DAMN!” Jake said, watching the strange creature.

 “Jake! Are you okay?”

“Yeah, yeah. I found ah, ah a baby alien here.”

“Oh good. Pretty friendly aren’t they?”

“Yeah, Yeah, I guess.”

“Well, bring it back with you, we have one here already.”

“Alright, will do.”

Jake reached out with his gloved hands and the alien waddled forward into his grasp. It began purring�"intensely. Jake twitched away.  Carefully, Jake picked the alien up and  began making some forward movement while carrying the alien under one arm, in the crook of an arm and then under his other arm, but carrying it made crawling very difficult. He loosened his bandolier and tucked the alien in a large netted pocket with the alien purring all the time. Must be rather comfortable in there, Jake thought.  After making a couple awkward portal transitions while keeping the alien safe, he finally made it to his work center.

As he peeked out from the sections portal, he was met by his coworkers’ applause and laughter.

“The mighty gladiator!” Joe said, taking the alien from Jake who wondered what they had heard over the radio when he blasted the slimy larvae. He was sure he didn’t SAY anything out loud�"or did he?

 Joe set the alien on the floor and it immediately began squealing with apparent glee. It waddled over to the other alien, and they began rubbing on each other. Jake watched with disgust as the two aliens cuddled and cooed. He crawled out of the portal, stood up stiffly and stretched his sore limbs. He ripped off his tool belt/bandolier and let it drop on the floor. Everyone else gathered around the two aliens pointing, whispering, and slapping each other on the back.

Joe turned away and strode over to Jake. “Glad you got out alright. We should’ve told you more, but we weren’t sure what was going on.” Joe glanced over his shoulder at the knot of tube crawlers around the cooing, cuddling aliens. “Hope you’re okay. Oh, seeing these two are the first we’re going to name them Adam and Eve. What do you think?” He thumbed over his shoulder. “Wasn’t all the work and wait worth it?”

Jake looked down at Joe and away. He balled up a fist and swung, contacting hard with Joe’s jaw flattening his short, fat supervisor to his butt.

“Jake! What’s got into you?” Joe said rubbing his jaw. “Are you out of your mind?

“I feel better now. Just keep your two damn midget aliens away from me. “