Ugly Girls

A man talks about a time he was sitting on a bench, people watching. Where he makes and observation about a certain girl.

 

To see an unattractive girl walking down the street is a fairly normal occurrence. They tend walk with their heads tilted slightly downwards as if they were ashamed of the unfavorable visage they burden the world with. Occasionally they hold their head a tad too high as if they knew they were ugly, but they also knew perfectly well that the other parts of their body, were just as good any other girls.

 

 However, the girl that was walking past me on Melbourne Street was by far one of the most putrid looking girls I had ever seen. This girl was wearing a slouchy t- shirt that caught itself between the crevices of the large rolls of fat that cascaded down her back and abdomen. Across her neck she wore a long silver chain with a sparkling peace medallion hitting the spot right above her obtuse belly button. Each time she took a step the medallion smacked against her bulging stomach then swung out towards the open air free from its regular pale and lumpy resting place. Contrasting against the paleness of her skin her navy jeans hugged at her sturdy legs making her seem like a bulky alabaster mountain balancing on two badly wrought jade pillars.

Her mousy hair was cut in the current style, and instead of the dramatic beauty she had obviously hoped for, she ended up with thin, limp, locks. Her plainness bubbling from under the finely cut bang with a few zits littered here and there on her stark complexion. Her classic nose was desecrated my a troupe of black heads clustered on it’s side and her eyes looked more like two damp whale fetuses than blue-grey.

And as this young girl walked past me the only emotion felt was complete and utter repulsion. Regardless of the friendly smile plastered on her blemish ridden face or the general look of contentment on the terrible face of hers. Revulsion, utter revulsion. This is the  plight of the ugly girls, and to b sad for them is an understatement.

Author's Note

This only took me a hour and I didn't edit it, so it may be iffy

Reviews

[Warrior]

Great story telling. This did justice in the realm of getting the message across. Great message. There's lot of times where a story can have a great message to aim for, and have a lot of under lining things but then no one gets it, and if no one gets it, then the point has failed. But in my opinion this did well to get the message across. You made it clear, which is why I think it's good. Keep up the good work. What was also great was that I could imagine the story as I read it, and that is also a strong point of stories. The ability to have the reader imagine it because after all we're reading not watching it, but it was as if I was there as I read this, and that is great. Good job once again.

[Motivation4Life]

Holy s**t! You're a really good writer! Wow but you dissed her really bad here in this piece hey, lol I like the art where you talk about how she's littered with zits lol. Very classic. Yeah it's a pity that some girls forget about the fact that true beauty really comes from the inside and the vibes they project are what count the most , I would like to learn from you actually it would be an honor :). Take Care and hope to speak to you soon.

[Lina Grey]

Ouch. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, but some just don't seem to cut it. Quite a descriptive piece you've got here. Interesting idea. Well done, even without edits (you didn't have any major mistakes anyway, nothing that seriously detrimented your story)

[Brynn]

Its sounds good. I really like your description of the "ugly girl." It really painted a picture in my mind. I also like the part about the necklace bouncing. The only thing about the description that I didn't like is you used the world "pale" and "plain" too much. It makes the piece sound like it runs on.
Over all it was awesome, epically for being written in just an hour. :)