I Heard Her Soul Cry

This was a dedication to a friend I no longer have contact with. She requested this piece and I took it as a challenge to complete it within the hour. Enjoy.

I remember you dearly, my friend... One of the few who cared to see, though we were always victims of circumstance. Living in the moment as stray cinders, just enough to satisfy the flash-point... I remember you broken, dear love... That night I stayed awake, desperate to help you fight back your darkness, for fear of losing you in the mist.

 I told the world that we would press on as a self-proclaimed truth, and dared the snow to move me as we stood upon the jagged rock...

 I turned my gaze to a light in the distance... It struck me as a turning point for our journey, but the fear of the darkness wouldn't let you walk with me... 

It broke my heart to release your hand, and I left that piece for you to hold; wishing that the light within would fight back the darkness as I ventured off to bring you that distant hope... 

I remember you patient, dear sister... You stood upon that broken stone, watching through the fog. Thankful for my sacrifice... I remember the moment you kissed that broken piece of my soul I had given you, and sent your words of gratitude with the wind before hiding your treasure in a place where even the darkness couldn't touch it.

 You decided to face the storm yourself... I heard your soul cry...

Author's Note

Constructive criticism always welcomed.

Reviews

[celestino j. oliveira]

damn, awesome . I like the part it broke my heart to release your hand. I have had that same feeling, but never put it into words. amazing. awesome way to put your feelings together. one thing I would do, and you don't have to is try to make it into a clear poetry form, it may look uniform and lame, but it will look good in print. :)

[Stephen]

I must say, if you don`t stop writin` then you`d be a great even a best writer around the world. Just believe me .. I`ve found those knacks in you what a great writer has have. Keep writing. I love how you write with the heart and howsoever ...the words ..yeah, the words you use penning down are very beautiful and directly touched the hearts. Well done!

[olla]

this one.. when you had no time to edit.. and I heard your soul..

[lovejulez03]

The way you put this together was wonderful... It fit. The sadness was constant yet the truths made me smile. Thank you for sharing

[Gypsy Warrior Queen]

Bring it's structure downward like her tears...the pieces of her soul falling away...your sight is magic...I am glad you were open.

[Sami Khalil]

"That night I stayed awake, desperate to help you fight back your darkness, for fear of losing you in the mist.

I told the world that we would press on as a self-proclaimed truth"

I proclaim a truth that you are a wonderful poet. You have wonderful lines even if it prose...Bravo.................

[Daydreamer]

If I had one word to describe this piece it would be, Haunting..