I saw Heaven once

This is a piece I wrote special for a contest on Writerscafe

I saw Heaven once...as a child that is I saw it.  A bright, gleaming place complete with angels dressed in white, golden harps, wings like clouds, the whole 9.  God opened the gates for me and I walked with her hand-in-hand through the streets.  We laughed and drank apple cider because she knew it was my favorite.  We played hide and seek and she taught me how to fly with my wings.  We looked down on the world and saw great good and great evil and at that point our mirth came to an end.  God took my shoulders in her hands and she told me I had a great mission to do on Earth and I was the only one who could do it.  My mission would take me to the strangest and most remote recesses of the globe and of my mind but I should not me discouraged by this, instead I should embrace it.  She told me all this and I could do nothing but weep from fear of losing myself in life.  God wiped my tears and told me not to be afraid, as long as I followed my spirit I could never lose myself.  With that I left Heaven and have been following my spirit ever since.  My mission is massive, but I believe I can complete it with God providing my strength and constantly filling my heart with the courage to move on despite adversities or confrontations.  Yae thou I walk through the valleys of shadow and death, I shall fear no evil for thou are with me. Amen.

Author's Note

I'm actually Buddhist.

Reviews

[Syldor]

It sounds pretty interesting. There are few grammar/spelling mistakes but sounds pretty good^^^ one thing did bother me though. "My mission would take me to the strangest and most remote recesses of the globe and of my mind but I should not me discouraged by this." I had to read this sentence several times to understand what it was saying. It might help if you rephrase the "recesses of the globe and of my mind" part. Also, if your trying to do a Christian view, God is male, and the psalms quote is actually though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death... But I still liked it.