1 year later

A Story by Kathryn Smith

On a cloudy tired August afternoon we went for a walk behind his place.

Down a strange willowy green meadow.

On a cement pathway.

Down the river, past the town.

In a hidden place.

I began to chase a butterfly.

And that's when he put the first knife into my back.

That is when he said he did something bad.

He confessed he cheated on me the night before.

I remember my heart not feeling anything at first, but gradually ripping apart.

I remember seeing a plane fly overhead and desperately wishing I could jump right on and fly away.

I remember being so envious of the birds.

They could just...fly away. Whenever they pleased.

The world stopped.

I wanted to hit him. I wanted to punch him.
I wanted to scream. I wanted to cry.

We just kept walking.

And then I remember thinking: How will I be in a year?
Still in agony?

Well...here I am.
And so much has changed.

I am now a woman who refuses to be treated like dirt.
Like a doormat.

Being cheated on was the worst pain I have ever known.
Worse than any injection of a needle.
Worse than any surgery.
Worse than any scrape or bruise.

Through my pain; I grew in the winter.

I am a woman of renewed kindness.
A woman who grew in her faith.
Who has a light, happy and grateful heart.