Coup de Foudre

Coup de Foudre

I read your words;

they flowed through every cell

in my wracked body.

Like electricity charging,

tingling from my finger tips,

to my toes.

A sensation enjoyed

with its reckless intention

and a deep desire for more.

I saw your picture,

caught my breath in gasps

and briefly dared hope.

When you walked through the door

time stood still

and I froze in awe.

I watched from afar

hanging on every word,

each inflection a sparked desire

to kiss your mouth

and I knew I had fallen.

 

28/10/12

Reviews

[jacob erin-cilberto]

falling in love with the words first---ah yes, i know this feeling...and then seeing the person and thinking, wow, those words came from this goddess?

and the bubble is not burst..the person is as real as her writing, as beautiful inside and out...

i want to kiss her page as well as her lips.

[John Alexander McFadyen]

Thank you Jacob. You can tell quite a bit about someone from their writing, so long as they write with emotion.

[s y e]

Wow, this was beautiful! I truly loved it!

The last lines were lovely a very passionate write

[John Alexander McFadyen]

Thank you NH

[Mark]

passion and heat. Very nice one John :)

[John Alexander McFadyen]

Thanks Mark

[John Alexander McFadyen]

Mark where have you gone?

[Aaron]

I can usually tell how much I enjoy a poem by how much I end up thinking about it.

I'm definitely thinking about this one.
The word choice doesn't feel like the typical love poem. Then you end the poem by saying that you had fallen. Of course, you imply in love but it's a fascinating word to end on.

The power of love at first sight is portrayed great. I also get the impression of a some fear of it.

I'm probably just digging way too deep. Anyway. I loved it. Thanks for sharing.

[John Alexander McFadyen]

Thank you Aaron for giving this such deep thought. Apprehension only in-so-far as I don't want her to disappear again like so many others.

[Leslie Philibert]

Fine piece of writing, I really like the presentation with broken phrases written in new lines and the way it is centrally typoed, good job.

[John Alexander McFadyen]

Thank you Leslie.

[Lily Mae]

Oh I love this.. so many times I have lost my heart to the words I read.. A beautiful write to come home to after a long quiet vacation..xo

[John Alexander McFadyen]

Lily thank you so much. Hope you enjoyed the vacation though!

[Southern Cross]

"When you walked through the door
time stood still
and I froze in awe." What an amazing feeling that initial meeting can create...words spoken come to life and all the world stands still..Beautiful piece

[John Alexander McFadyen]

Thank you SC I am very grateful.

[Claire Twinn]

Aaaah, tres romantique! A lovely, heart warming poem John, you captured the feeling with passion and depth.

[John Alexander McFadyen]

Thank you Claire glad you like it.

[afra]

i love the ending ....great write

[John Alexander McFadyen]

Thanks Afra

[SHEEMA HUQ]

Oh those precious intial meetings have been captured convincingly in this poem, reminding me of the beauty- the agony- the apprehension involved when meeting special/signifiant others...nice writing.

[John Alexander McFadyen]

Thank you Sheema.