In Your Hands

In Your Hands

Until you come to earth

we will be separated

by time and space.

I know you sit in heaven’s

gentle breast

upon the cloud of fear

afraid to believe in my love;

the love I have professed for you

forever, and never will deny.

For it is a living breathing beast

that even I cannot control.

It consumes all of me

and cannot be satiate

until we two are consummate.

Tis you, your soul,

who has unleashed this monster

who swells within me,

who drowns me in the dream

of loving you forever.

Only you can tame such

desire and make it flourish

into the most romantic tale

or bludgeon it with the cudgel

of mistrust,

and kill it dead.

 

05/08/14

Reviews

[Leslie Philibert]

Lots of things I like here,the line break L4 to L5, the good use of the semi colon in L7 ( I know this may sound silly to some, but punctuation and form are ( my POV) very important). And fine too the paced lines from the middle, which exactly fit the theme ; well done, a fine poem

[John Alexander McFadyen]

Leslie I am humbled as I admit to having no technical knowlege worth speaking of when it comes to poetry and I marvel at your wonderful and uplifting form and metre.

[Ruth]

Takes a brave heart to glide into the want or need of another - I guess :) The imagery here is fantastic, as always John! x

[John Alexander McFadyen]

Thank you for such a nice comment Poppy.

[Ruth]

My pleasure hon :) x

[Frieda P]

I'm not sure if this is a love poem or a death wish....I understand the sentiment, so often we'd like to murderlize those we love, but it's not very romantic if intended for someone you're trying to woo, did you ever think perhaps you scare the bejaysus out of her John? ;) Is this like the Scottish version of endearment or something....?

[John Alexander McFadyen]

Tis but poetic ramblings my Lady!

[Frieda P]

Pfft, pish and tush, you never do anything without intention my lord!

[John Alexander McFadyen]

My Lady you and only you know of these intentions!

[AprilRN1210]

It is hard to love someone that deeply and not have that love reciprocated in everyway possible... fear is a powerful thing, and can keep us from taking that leap---- afraid to get hurt again.. I imagine it is heartbreaking and frustrating to be madly in love with someone who loves you, but afraid to take that risk and put their trust in you... Having faith in someone new is difficult for those of us who have had our heart broken, our trust betrayed ...

This is full of heartfelt, tender, emotion--- dripping with frustrated longing and affection. Very nice...

[John Alexander McFadyen]

April I am always so grateful for you thoughtful reviews. Many thanks.

[AprilRN1210]

ditto, sir... You make it easy when your work is so pleasant and brilliant. I honestly enjoy your writing, and your reviews:)
you're more than welcome.

[Lydia Shutter]

What a romantic love poem this is, John. It has a classic feel to it. When a love consumes your very soul, it is horribly sad if that love is not returned. Beautifully written. Lydi**

[John Alexander McFadyen]

Thank you Lydi, I feel every word.

[willweb]

Either or, this was beautiful. Good or bad, it finds me smiling as I read today. Love can be both at times and it can not. I really enjoyed this poem John Gabriel.

[John Alexander McFadyen]

Thank you so very much!

[Lyn Anderson]

The end is a really big ouch. Such intense emotion here. How can anyone not fall for such intensity? I don't know, this is a tough one to wear out on your sleeve.

[John Alexander McFadyen]

She is a one off!

[Lyn Anderson]

You aren't like that. You don't fool me.

[John Alexander McFadyen]

Like what? She is my life!

[Lyn Anderson]

Okay, well, one off does not mean that here -- communication issues.

[John Alexander McFadyen]

I meant she was really special.

[John Alexander McFadyen]

No messing, really special.

[Lyn Anderson]

I get it now - so one of a kind, not a one off. One offs are tossers.

[John Alexander McFadyen]

Ok English vs American/Canadian!

[Lyn Anderson]

Yes sir, I believe that is it.

[John Alexander McFadyen]

Sir is good it shows subserviance!

[Lyn Anderson]

ha ha ha, so you imagine.

[John Alexander McFadyen]

Get beneath me woman!

[Lyn Anderson]

I am laughing hysterically now. Where's Frieda to join in the fun?

[John Alexander McFadyen]

Jeeze I want to survive the night so please don't summon up madame hot pants lol!

[John Alexander McFadyen]

Oh s**t! Frieda is going to so kill me now!

[Lyn Anderson]

Oh, she missed you too -- but yes, she is going to smack you.

[Frieda P]

Ha, I guess I'm not the only one....glad you gave it to him KL!