Lost Boy

The challenge of growing up.

Lost Boy

You struggled with identity,

with being a whole person

who was moving from child,

in the shadow of a dominant

and confident older sister

who could not put a foot wrong,

to being an adult.

And you stuttered.

Food became an insult

as you used starvation

to check your transition.

And you used every way

possible to prevent your growth

and the acceptance of life.

Now you say you have moved on.

Now you seem to have found

some form of structure,

some inner happiness

and understanding of yourself,

and your worth.

But is it simply an illusion

a way of fooling you and us all

as you drown in the excuse

of hard student drunkenness?

 

02/11/14

Author's Note

Reviews

[MomzillaNC]

Growing up is a difficult journey and we're so easily misled. Well penned.

[John Alexander McFadyen]

Many thanks.

[MomzillaNC]

You're welcome.

[The Black Warrior]

I like this poem. I can picture this for I went through it. It's hard to grow up. LOL

[John Alexander McFadyen]

I did too and to watch my son do so was painful. He is still a work in progress. Thank you Suk.

[The Black Warrior]

haha I am still a work in progress :) thank you for sharing!

[John Alexander McFadyen]

From your writing you are developing along the right lines dear girl.

[The Black Warrior]

haha Thank you, but the communciation part... that is killing me. I can write but I can't talk. LOL that is a big issue right there.

[John Alexander McFadyen]

Just give it time and get yourself to take a risk now and again. The earth will not open up and swallow you and the more you do it the easier it comes. Do you mind telling me your age?

[The Black Warrior]

I don't mind I just turned 20 today!!! :)

[John Alexander McFadyen]

Happy Birthday Suk!. You have plenty of time so don't be hard on youself for being sensitive. Just give it time and understand that everyone moves at a different pace. Even the confident ones often are hiding behind a mask,

[The Black Warrior]

Thank You John, and I won't be hard on myself! :) thank you for listening lol

[John Alexander McFadyen]

You are welcome young poetess.

[Lydia Shutter]

Growing up is not easy and along the way people tend to wear masks or costumes....create illusions. Self identities are formed during the teenage years. Often it is hard to move past them. Your words prove you are a good father....and you understand. Lydi**

[John Alexander McFadyen]

Thank you Lydi for such a generous andgracious review Lydi

[Pryde Foltz]

But is it simply an illusion
a way of fooling you and us all
as you drown in the excuse
of hard student drunkenness?

We do love our illusions … why … when what is lasting is so much more satisfying. A chance to play … I guess … but that play can sure hurt. Great write here, John.

[John Alexander McFadyen]

Thanks Pryde. I think some people are not so much playing as hiding from what they see as their truth,

[Pryde Foltz]

That is true.

[Beccy]

I'm one of four, I have an elder sister and two younger brothers. I don't recall every particularly living in the shadow of my sister, but I do know the younger of my two brothers used to feel a little like that at times.

Keep hugging him.

Beccy.

[John Alexander McFadyen]

Thank you Beccy.

[Lyn Anderson]

Whether it be an excuse or a reason, changes not the struggle of the person who is lost.

[John Alexander McFadyen]

I know and that is why I hug him as often as I can. Thanks 'M'

[jacob erin-cilberto]

it's tough being a younger brother...i know...and relate to this poem well.

i was always the outcast of the family...the one no one understood or wanted to as i tried to find myself in all the mess...
the journey, even with its tribulations, worth it...
sooner or later we figure it out...sometimes we prematurely think we have...when we aren't there yet.

excellent poem

[John Alexander McFadyen]

Thank you Jacob for such understanding and kindness.