My Fall

Into the darkness.....................

My Fall

The wind of perpetual pain

plays sad and empty melodies

upon my naked skin,

again.

The cold drives deep

into the core that is me,

leaving me moribund,

flat lined.

Starved of the life blood

of loving another

I sink into darkness,

alone.

There my fate is cast

in the black inferno,

where my soul burns,

to ash.

And there will be no relief

for Paradiso is beyond my reach

and I am condemned,

forever.

 

23/11/14

Author's Note

Reviews

[Leslie Philibert]

A poet I know and like, who has a fine feeling for line breaks, like paradiso too, the use of this takes the
weight out of the line, makes it lighter..

[John Alexander McFadyen]

Thank you Leslie, always so nice to read you and hear your views.

[The Black Warrior]

I don't like it, its too dark LOL just kidding! I really like it, it has such a great imagery. I felt like I was the one cast to hell...meaning you captured my attention and I was able to imagine what you were trying to say, word by word...nicely done John!

[John Alexander McFadyen]

Thank you so much Suk.

[The Black Warrior]

You are very welcome! ;) I enjoyed reading this poem!

[jacob erin-cilberto]

such sadness...loss of love puts on that moribund track...

definitely...

you come up with seldom used words and fit them so nicely into your work.

[John Alexander McFadyen]

Thank you Jacob

[Lyn Anderson]

I really like this, although dark and depressing, it works well.
One thing, I wonder if cast into would be better than cast in -- unless you wanted to make it the double meeting.

[John Alexander McFadyen]

I just went into it.

[Pryde Foltz]

Starved of the life blood
of loving another
I sink into darkness,
alone.

A very expressive and well-writ piece. The two beat on every fourth line was very effective.

[John Alexander McFadyen]

Thank you Pryde