We Came To A Clearing

Artwork by Pauline Wood-now enhanced with the advice of Rascal.

We Came To A Clearing

Our fingers entwined,
as one …
my grip soft, but firm,
revealing my adoration
and respect for you
as an independent being.

The wood
was muted in colours
of summer's shadows;
the fresh scent
of leaf mould, moss,
and blue bells
was warmly intoxicating,
and our stroll sublime.

Your fragrance
filled me to bursting,
your artistry
captured my heart and my mind;

then, we came to the clearing.

A hypnotic dell …
where sunlight
penetrated the canopy,
to bring warmth
and new growth.

Here,
amongst the magic of the glade
and it's softly verdant bed,
we made forever promises,
and …
the most beautiful,
passionate love.


29/06/15

Author's Note

Reviews

[Mayank Sharma]

Very very nice work.Great imagery.Nice rhyme.Great theme.The perfect work.

[John Alexander McFadyen]

Many thanks but it is free verse, no rhyme lol!

[J.J. NIGHTINGALE]

Wow, this one moved me, in many ways...mostly, upward..towards heaven.....ahhhh


Jasmine...

[John Alexander McFadyen]

Thank you sweet lady!

[J.J. NIGHTINGALE]

You are Welcome John..............:).........

[Richard🖌]

Goodness-ME, John!

You'll have all the girls queuing and elbowing their way to get to this one … it is a brilliantly captivating and breathtaking piece, My Friend, rivaled only by Browning, Himself!

As much as you've captivated the olde romantic in me, you've caught the eye of the olde teacher, too. I favor this marvelously rendered piece so very much it is incumbent upon me to mention a few issues I believe will make it the virtual masterpiece it deserves to be, and with your permission it would be my pleasure to copy/paste your poem below my review and edit it for that purpose, repaying your kindness in so generously helping me with my own poetry (by-the-way, you're the only one who has).

If you'd rather not, I certainly understand and respect that privilege.
Whatever, you've once again made my moments on your pages a wondrous poetic adventure of sheer enjoyment! ⁓ Richard

[John Alexander McFadyen]

You do not need my permission Richard. I am yearning to grow and deplore the absolute need to stick to bland and uncritical comments. Too many offer sad and lifeless platitudes.

[Richard🖌]

Well, John,
As I am sure you know, so many take offense at the least mention that they might need to improve, one never knows, but the same goes for my poems if you feel I can improve … one never gets better when they are so stuck on themselves they cannot learn, eh … LOL!
Note spacing, eliminating unnecessary flow-clogging fat (and's, the's, etc) word, line-break, and punctuation edits … here goes:

We Came To A Clearing

Our fingers entwined,
as one …
my grip soft, but firm,
revealing my adoration
and respect for you
as an independent being.

The wood
was muted in colours
of summer's shadows;
the fresh scent
of leaf mould, moss,
and blue bells
was warmly intoxicating,
and our stroll sublime.

Your fragrance
filled me to bursting,
your artistry
captured my heart and my mind;

then, we came to the clearing.

A hypnotic dell …
where sunlight
penetrated the canopy,
to bring warmth
and new growth.

Here,
amongst the magic of the glade
and it's softly verdant bed,
we made forever promises,
and …
the most beautiful,
passionate love.


29/06/15

[Richard🖌]

Yee-doggies, John!
I am amazed that you used my review edits verbatim — I am truly honored … thank you, My Friend! 〜 Richard

[John Alexander McFadyen]

I am here to learn and improve Richard and although I do not always accept what others offer, I do appreciate that they have taken the trouble to cognitively assimilate my writing. In this case everything you offered felt like enhancement. Thank you Richard.

[Richard🖌]

Truly, John, you are welcome, My Friend.

[fattycbreezy52]

Seems like you are reminiscing;D
I hope it's the case because I'll be glad upon knowing these passionate feelings being so real, intense and heartfelt.This is amazing:)

[John Alexander McFadyen]

Ha I wish FCB! Based upon the picture which I bought and sent to my sister in Australia. Many thanks.

[Robert]

I passionate poem here John and a vivid glimpse shared with the readers.

[John Alexander McFadyen]

Thanks Robert. It was inspired by the artwork in the picture, 'We Came To A Clearing' by Pauline Wood, which I bought and sent to my sister as an engagement present.

[andrew mitchell]

A lovely journey through the fields of love which I enjoyed more than the metaphor behind this. Very Romantic although with face painted blue running thro the fields with your kilt on with your tackle bouncing freely and shouting Braveheart could scare any lass if she isn't a Scottish Lass lol:) A terrific write John and a Braveheart song perfect!:):):):)

[John Alexander McFadyen]

The cry was 'A Bruce, a Bruce! and the woad gave us that unwashed, fierce and menacing look lol
read moreThe cry was 'A Bruce, a Bruce! and the woad gave us that unwashed, fierce and menacing look lol
Thanks Andrew

[....................]

A clearing, literally and figuratively... a clearing of the heart to make way for those promises of forever love...and in the past tense it seems to be a memory, but a one worth reliving... beautiful writing, John and love the art work and the song...

[John Alexander McFadyen]

Thank you so much FT!

[~]

You are such a gentleman. Inside and out your words are true to your passionate heart.
loved it! :D

[John Alexander McFadyen]

Thank you for such kindness MS

[sereenaoutloud]

We made forever promises... Love this ..what a romantic you are John!
Love the song too you always pick the best songs to accompany your writes!!

[John Alexander McFadyen]

First fell in love at four years of age lol! Then fell in love with my primary (junior) school teacher. Thank you for liking both Sereena. Many thanks

[sereenaoutloud]

at the age of 4? ... geez i dont even remember 4 lol
see you have always been a hopeless romantic... hehehehe

[John Alexander McFadyen]

Hopeless and romantic lol Oh I remember her to this day. She was a bus conductress (sold the tickets). She live upstairs and I used to wait for her to get home. One day she bought me loads of chocolate. Think she might have been coming on to me lol!

[sereenaoutloud]

Lol.. she bought you sweeties and that was it you were hooked... so easily pleased at 4 lol :)
too funny!!

[John Alexander McFadyen]

Oh yes I am easy but once smitten I am loyal

[sereenaoutloud]

Loyalty excellent trait to have John...This reminds me of a saying i grew up hearing AAAALLLLLLL the time..

"Blood makes you related, loyalty makes you family!"

[John Alexander McFadyen]

Indeed it does Sereena.

[wordman]

lord we are getting passionate john,great write

[John Alexander McFadyen]

Ha! WM I AM passionate and it has undone me. Many thanks.