A Soul Abandoned

How soft the underbelly of love?

I am not god the father,

nor Jesus Christ,

but still

you have forsaken me.

Erased me from your memories,

excluded me from

your world,

barred me from

your wet dreams.

Is life so very fragile

that feelings dissolve

like morning mist

simply because the sun

has risen?

Even a January of snows

cannot carpet over

the feelings we shared.

 

17/02/19

Author's Note

Reviews

[Hasan669]

Separation is always emotionally painful, and this is an interesting study of just such a parting of ways. Interesting reference to religion here, and I felt most moved by the last two lines which describe how a covering of January snow cannot hide the warmth felt between the two people concerned. I think this is an emotional and at the same time very poignant poem.

[John Alexander McFadyen]

Thank you Hasan for reading and getting it right.

[andrew mitchell]

Letting go ain’t easy as are the lessons we learn from life, a heartfelt tormenting write John.

[John Alexander McFadyen]

Thank you Andrew.

[Einstein Noodle]

your poem creates a strong desire for absolution of love now gone ;((( in your closing all i could think about is not being able to be buried because the ground is frozen .. so in death i try desperately to pull a blanket of snow and dead layers of turf over me ...just give me peace ...i let go ;))) well.... obviously your poem involved me start to finish ... so a hearty well done sir!!
E.

[John Alexander McFadyen]

I am honoured dear 'E' and pleased that you felt involved. Many thank yous!

[Chris Shaw]

Real feelings of abandonment here John. The hurt comes through. It happens, relationships are complicated and can be fragile. What you may think strong can be broken as easily as dropping a favourite vase.

Chris

[John Alexander McFadyen]

Indeed Chris tis true. I did raid someone else's larder for the 'January of snows' phrase. Many thanks.

[wordman]

i can feel you on this john

[John Alexander McFadyen]

Cheers Ron, hope all is good?

[wordman]

doing great john

[John Alexander McFadyen]

Glad to hear it Ron, and it is good to see all the good people still writing on WC.

[wordman]

they come and go john

[gram linski]

Now that's what I'm talking about, John, welcome to my hopes and dreams,

[John Alexander McFadyen]

Cheers Gram, many thanks.

[Kelly Scheppers]

"Even a January of snows
cannot carpet over
the feelings we shared."

I'm not sure that it was meant to flatter me, but it does. It reads beautifully, John. Thank you!

[John Alexander McFadyen]

Glad it made you feel something good Kelly and hope you did not mind me 'borrowing' that great phrase? Many thank yous!