He Loves Me, He Loves Me Not

Oh... men =p

I walk along this winded road,
My mind is lost in thought,
I’m trapped in indecision,
He loves me, he loves me not.
I pull up a lonely flower,
Pluck the petals one by one,
My heart and mind are fighting,
And it’s time that someone won.
I can’t to myself softly,
I want to bring this to an end,
I need to know where I’m turning,
To a love or to a friend.
My heart begins to flutter,
As I reach my destination,
There are only two petals left,
There can be no hesitation.
But I can’t bring myself to do it,
I don’t think I want to know,
So I drop the destined flower,
And I let my confusion grow.

:::::

Courtney Shaddock

Author's Note

Constructive criticism?

Reviews

[Eternally Elemental]

I would leave it as is. Maybe just break up the lines a bit so it is not one big block, but the actual content doesn't need to be changed... well I don't think it should be changed.

I can imagine the lonely little posy, so cute by the way, being slowly picked.
I feel like I am in this scenario in my real life. Not sure whether to chase it, afraid of the outcome.

The imagery is clear the the story easy to relate to. I really like it :D

[Su' Nacnetaf]

I don't have constructive criticism, for I think this piece is actually very good as it is, well written and somewhat innocent maybe. Good writing.

[Zeitgeist Manifesto]

I love the theme. Sometimes we need help, but our minds are already made up. We know whats best for
us, but hope makes us deny the truth. This piece is calm, but there is an eerie sense of chaos in it for me.
Kudos.