Original story of Entered the Glare in Glass

Original story

A slight breeze blew the flakes ever so gently to the left, as the ghostly feminine stepped forward.

Asland is a vast, verdant world with enough room for all races. But danger is growing in the East. The ancient Shadow Devils grow hungry for power and are Hell-bent on enslaving all other neighboring peoples. They have set their sights on capturing cities, large and small, to fuel their demonic magic. In the face of destruction, the western kingdoms must now put aside past differences to forge an alliance strong enough to withstand the Shadow Devils' influence. It is a bleak time. It is a time for heroes.

 

 

Author's Note

what do you think of the dialogue, etc. should this be in the first chapter? continue the story from where I left off? Would you like to see the characters? Art?

Reviews

[Dee Okolotowicz]

I found your story opening interesting and complex. It has a lot of possibilities. There is a lot of back story here which I found a little long. Is there any way to reveal some of it later in the story, rather than all upfront at once? I tend to find stories with long openings and no dialogue a bit cumbersome. Also, the main character's reality...he's in Russia? So he's in the "real world" and the back story is set in a fantasy world, and they'll be a connection later?