High School Poem #2 - #3

#2    Sincerely I Do

 

intimate intrests that stretch

long goodbyes

like when i kiss you

in my mirror

when i cry Juliet tears

scream Romeo's need

 

sincerely i do

could and would and kill

push the mountains for your will

carry the world

pay your bills...if only

you would say

 

sincerely i do...

 

when entangled thoughts

knurl & curl in fevered dream,

you embody all that i grieve for

all that i thought

could never have need for

 

sincerely i do

 

want to wear you

like mother-midnight

dons her stars

want to slip on your lips on my skin

and name it wonderful

 

sincerely i do

crave you - like the hunger

of the homeless

i am addicted

to your scent and smiles,

your freckles,

your easy going style

i need you

 

sincerely i do

love

you...

 

 

#3    In Your Eyes

 

i wanted to give up

give in

believe in nothing

but cruel stagnation

deplete of imagination,

but here you stand--new beginning,

naming my kiss

defining my jeans

as if something more

something else, divine,

drawing me

to you / every word you speak : prophetic...

i am a puppet to its whim

for i feel as if i'm falling

hanging by a limb

every kiss / a wonderful reality

so it begins

no lies, no duality

just know me / learn

by your eyes,

gladly i will burn

in your eyes...

a fire quenched by a look

no definition

inside our new written book

inside your eyes...

Reviews

[Collette]

Wow, I really dig them both, but #2 blew me away....it starts off so strong, grabbed me right away with:

when i cry Juliet tears
scream Romeo's need

so much is said in those two lines...I could feel your emotion, and the combined emotions of romeo, juliet....quite a way to describe something. I like that there is a sense of desperation in this piece...as if you would literally do anything to convey the feelings you have for your lover. It's tragic and romantic all at once. There isn't much I would do to change it, although interest is misspelled in the first line. Otherwise, I think it is perfect. It passes on the meaning, and also allows room for individual connection...this is about your situation, but it could be anyone. catch my drift?

thanks for sharing!