Turns Out

Sometimes my words come off a bit silly

Thoughts falling into letters to you may be out of bounds,

but I have never lied to you

and I won't start now.

I must have been M.I.A

when God handed out shame and dignitiy.

When it comes to you, I have neither and I can't say that I regret it.

I closed my eyes last night

hoping that the meditation would break this

But it turns out I can't even lie to myself

as I picture you standing in front of me.

 

Reviews

[wicked.wanderer]

I like this!
I can't say I love this, but I'm a very picky reader and have brash criticism, so don't take that to heart. :]]
There's a certain flow to this; when you typed "M.I.A.", I would have liked it if you'd have said the full "Missing In Action" - it continues the rhythm. The ending, however, left me kind of... I don't know, it felt like I was lacking something crucial. I believe if you perked up the ending, added something more substantial than the image you currently have, this would be awesome.
I believe that in poetry one should not explain their images, but give them; here, I felt like you gave me a picture ripped in half, and I'm desperately wanting that other piece.
I know, that sounds so mean!
But still.
I have to say I do like this. :D

[Hillary A]

whoaaa very good! the rhyming was a bit sketchy but still a really great job.
keep it up!