Where Did I Go Wrong?

what's happening?

where did i go wrong?

time flies when life's great

now it slows

damn cirlce starts

 

my mind's haunted

memories of the past

keep bringing up

keep showing up

why can't they leave me alone?

 

i want to heal

i want to change

i want to get better

i want to stop.

 

stop being the emo kid

stop being the heartless one

stop being single

just cuz i can't handle

anyone's touch

 

where did i go wrong?

i was happy once.

i was fine once.

i was alive once.

 

but i can't feel anymore

put on my little mask

and face another day

full of heartache

 

my past is haunting me

it's in my mind

where did i go wrong?

when will it stop?

get it out of my head

get it the f**k out.

 

i can't handle this

it's wearin' me out

it's tearing me apart

it's killing me slowly

from the inside out.

 

can't you see them?

f*****g scars on my wrists.

up and down my arms

all physical

mental is harder to see

 

even there i hurt

scarred from a past

too horrible to remember

where did i go wrong?

did i make a mistake?

that i should have to suffer so?

 

i shiver at night

i need someone's touch

i need that comfort

but i'll never get it

cuz it just brings on nightmares.

 

of lily white hands

and whispered words

that i can't even remember

if only it wasn't blocked out

if only there wasn't that wall

maybe i'd get better

 

where did i go wrong?

it's my fault

somewhere i messed up

somewhere i caused this

why?

dear God, why torture me?

 

but of course, God doesn't

it's in my head

it's all my fault

it's all my damned fault

somehow, someway.

 

how could i cause this?

is it my life that brings it on?

are my friends to suffer

because i can't run?

they won't let me go

won't let me die.

 

i can't make them hurt

anymore than they do

for my suicide

so i won't

i'll only daydream

about slitting soft skin

 

how could i do this?

where did i go wrong?

why can't i touch?

why can't i think?

why can't i love?

 

where did i go wrong?