i shall not die

i bright blue glow with a bright orange tip

the sunsets slow with a firery blits

engolfed with flames with a raging roartorchering me again dear lucifer

screeching over again give up give up

makeing us suffer like a pigion being plucked

i will not go down to long ive been greivin

i damn you demons to hell

i will not go down i shall not fail

Reviews

[Gone]

This poem is worth working on a little more. If you run it through a spell checker and put in some punctuation, it will read much better. The mitre is good and once I worked out the punctuation on my second read, the meaning was clear. Take a little more time to get everything right, and your investment will be rewarded. People tend to see bad grammer and spelling as shoddy workmanship. This puts them off reading and reviewing your work. Please do not take the above as critisism. I have battled and overcome dyslexia so it is still not easy for me.

[GreenSkeleton16]

i agree with the person who said about tweaking it a little cause ur so good and when u take the time to fix the little mistakes it will make it so much better and everyone will see how freakin awesome of a writer you are!!

[glabby]

wow thats deep

[sonny]

sweet

[sonny]

it is sweet dude