~KillER THOUGHTS~

           

 

           I see the darkness in my eyes

 

          I hear the shouts of there cries

 

          I feel the pain that they endure

 

        I think it's them, but I'm not to sure

 

            Blood dripping on the floor

 

             All from the inner core

 

         I see you scream as I walk near

 

           I can see your every fear

 

        You won't run, and you won't fret

 

    My eyes lock on yours, I'm your only threat

 

       I stand over you, and I look down

 

    I go for the kill, and you hit the ground

 

       I feel the pain that you did not

 

  I put the gun to my temple for one last shot

 

             Oh what have I become

 

 A demon from hell rising like a new bound sun

 

       I put my finger on the trigger

 

 I pull it back and I'm gone into the wind

Author's Note

I'm not like that lol It just came out at a time when I was angrey

Reviews

[Eric]

Probably not what you were relating this to, but this kind of anger that is so fierce that then turns inward is something that''s unfortunately so prevalent in the ranks. After witnessing so much, losing so much, and enduring so much, even the most resilient can snap into this mindset.

[RainDancer1997]

A think a poem is like something that a lot of people don't see the same thing in. Everyone usually gets a dffrent meaning:-)

[Nessie_AJ]

oh my gosh oh my gosh! this was amazing! the intensity had me hooked! can't wait to read more of your stuff!

[MikeV]

I loved this poem! Mostly because i can relate, not to tbe poem lol well, maybe a lil :) no but really i can
relate to the," I'm not like that." I write so much stuff that has absolutely nothing
to do with me. Lol anyway, keep up the good work!!

[Amber Daniel]

Wow, that ended way differently then I thought it would. That was so good though!

[JordanIsaacSmith]

I've felt like this before, and had pretty similar feelings. I've anaged to get a grip on my anger over the years though. Very well written poem, and the deeper meaning behind some of it is very well done.

[RainDancer1997]

Thanks you:)

[Wall of Words]

This poem goes deep. It's not something that is really treated lightly. The whole feeling of anger pulses underneath the words, and the even deeper feeling of remorse after the rush of anger. It's common, and very true. Not that everybody gets so angry they want to go out and kill something, but the general feeling of anger and hate is there.
Very well written, I especially like the deeper feelings and means that can be deciphered. :)
Sylvia.

[Wolfwind]

Writing is at it's funnest when we can let our frustrations and anger into the ink. I liked the descriptive nature of the piece. It really paints the evolution of a darker side of humanity.
A few typos to watch... Line 2 "there" should be "their"
Third line from the bottom... "new bound sun" ? "Did you mean, "new born sun"

Other than those two lines... this was really well timed and delivered.

Great Ink!
Aaron

[RainDancer1997]

Thanks for showing me that:)

[Christopher Angel]

Whoa, this was really good. Just one mistake, 'I hear the shouts of there cries' It should be their, not there.

Other than that, this was perfect. I loved the tone. It was slow and menacing and when it picked up toward the end, it was over so fast like a shot in the dark. I really liked it lots

[dw817]

Oof ... Well those are certainly some angry thoughts ! I tell ya, when I get all het up myself, I go and do something else that's relaxing. Most of my anger is turned inwards however, so it's not too often that you can ever see in it in me.

I do work out and write out some of my anger in my stories at times tho. :)

[Lucien Maier]

nice release of emotion. you bring the reader into the situation very well.