Glass Joe

This poem was inspired by the Punch-Out video game

I'm an ex-prizefighter and my name is Glass Joe.

If you're wondering if I could win fights, the answer is no.

I got my a*s kicked by a shrimp and his name is Little Mac.

I got knocked out in the first round when that boy attacked.

I'm called Glass Joe because my jaw is made of glass.

It was humiliating because anybody could kick my a*s.

People laugh at my losses and it's something I resent.

I happen to be Glass Joe Biden and I'm the President.

I run America but I sure can't take a punch.

If you hit me in my stomach, I'll lose my lunch.

I lied to everybody when I said that I came from France.

I got a*s whippings in the ring, I never stood a chance.

Even old women could knock me out and I'm not a fighter anymore.

If Americans learn that I lost ninety-nine fights, I won't win in 2024.