Oubliette

There was a feeling rising up from deep within.
Like a darkened spot of tyranny stuck in my throat.
Cancerous and growing I abolished love.
An oubliette for my thoughts.

Banished, my light seeking dreams of hope fade.
I am left with only the feeling of loneliness.
Betrayed at the root of the heart.
She is gone and will not return.

Author's Note

Reviews

[icelandicblue]

An oubliette for my thoughts, that is a unique and effective line. What an incredibly strong image of loss and pain you have created in this piece.

[Frieda P]

Your title drew me in...this is darkly colored in hues of loneliness and regret. Music adds to that eerie lonely feeling of darkness too.

[SpeedyHobbit Armstrong]

I like both the dungeon imagery and that you zeroed in on a specific sort of dungeon (the kind that in fantasy would generally mean a character is royally screwed) for the title. I also notice you allude to a sense of exile, suffering and betrayal. I am sort of imagining a story even as I read this poem, clearly about someone who let you down very badly.

[Kenneth The Poet]

A blunt force strike to the being within. Powerful stuff.

Very beautiful, to see love as deep as such, a "almost growth".
She left, and gave an aftertaste in the throat, how deep...
chokingly brilliant, friend.... music once again too.... goosebumps.

- Elisa

[V. P. Trujillo]

This is short and to the point, I like it. One of your newer ones?

[Raymond Federle]

yes. This is new. Written in the last few weeks. I seem to go through peroids of short to long poetry. Some things just want to be expressed more that others but I've always felt when something feels done...it's done. Thanks for checking my stuff out. I'll pop over and take a peek at yours. :)