Watching the Watchers

Watching the Watchers

There's a place inside my heart, where resides my ego and my Id.

When my soul's laid open bare for all to see.

It's where I find the inner me is laughing de tout coeur .

And where my one true self is hid.

I did not intend to find so fine a place such as this is,

and these walls took quite a lengthy time to build.

And I find that in my mind I have everlasting time,

emotionaly, to run far and wide afield.

So while you sit there and enjoy a most amusing look,

at what you must assume myself to be.

I'm there to, just slightly over, looking across your right hand shoulder,

watching you, enjoying watching me.

Reviews

[FateDictates]

ahh at last something that leaves me with a smile....

[Baby Ricochet]

finding the true self makes us glow like sparklers in the park

[Worth_A_Wink]

A very lovely poem and least to say, I'm a fan of your style. As several folks have already said, this poem is very clever. Fine job.

;)

[Eric Pudalov]

I can see why people call you "The Dark Dr. Seuss" now! As darkly humorous as this piece can be, it definitely has a melancholy note to it.

I especially enjoyed the lines "I did not intend to find so fine a place such as this is/and these walls took quite a lengthy time to build," and the entirety of the last stanza! In fact, I can certainly relate to these lines as well. I have a tendency to build walls around myself, although they seem rather thin at times.

I also just read your mini-bio, and noticed that you said "To me poetry isn't about picking apart for analysis or 'a good read," etc. I admit I tend to do that, but at the same time, I know that poetry, overall, is about feelings. If you prefer not to receive grammar/spelling advice and such, I understand that.

All that said, it is a pleasure to meet you, sir, and I think you are a talented writer with a distinctive style!

[Antoinette]

The last four lines killed me..

[Raymond Federle]

Thanks1 :)

[Tina Kline]

Nicely done. Very impressive and clever piece of writing/
I enjoyed the darkness and the unexpected twist at the end.

[Ruth]

Clever twist hon...
Emotional and a little dark and unsettling...
Awesome :) x

[Micheal Abraham]

great piece enjoyed reading it

[Raymond Federle]

Thank you very much!

[Judy]

I love this poem - from its title with its alliteration - to its unique wording and emotion. This is powerful, and to me, quite original.

[Raymond Federle]

Thank you! :)