The Blade Of Betrayal

Laura was a easy going eighteen year old girl,she had tons of friends,amazing life,good clothes and a lovely family and house.But deep down Laura felt like no one understood her,she felt like they used her for her clothes and for how popular she was.Every night as she got home and went to her bedroom she would take out her diary and pour her feelings into it,writing for hours about how she didn't trust how her friends felt about her,describing in detail what had happened that day and every night she covered the page in tears then she would sit when she had finished writing and think back to the days events,all the flirting and the talk,the plans that where being made.But every night that made her worse as she didn't want to be used for everything she had.Day after day she came home and did this and one day she heard one of her friends talking about her on her way out of school.It was her friend Christina 'God I can't pretend to be her friend much longer! Spending time with her is like being with your boring old grandparents for a week!' Shutting her eyes Laura had ran home straight into the kitchen and grabbed a knife.When she got to her bedroom she ran into her bathroom and cut her wrists then sat on the floor and let herself bleed for a while.Each day she did this and each day she filled her diary with story's of the day at school and how she heard her friends talk about her then act like they loved her.Each day it got worse till she finally cracked and told her parents what she had been doing,she showed them the scars and the diary and told them what her friends had been saying.They brought her to therapy for 3 months until she got better,they moved her to a better school where she made real friends who loved her for her and she finally stopped cutting,she wrote a diary to make sure she didn't cut or doubt herself or her friends.She learnt that cutting just because she was hurt was wrong and painful to herself and her family.

Author's Note

I wrote this because I know people who have or do cut.If there is anything I need to change please please tell me.Thank you :)

Reviews

[Victoria PoetryBunny]

This is a really nice powerful story, really felt feelings in it. Hmm at the beginning of this in the line "she had tones of friends" tones should be tons. Wow and at this part i just wanted to be there for her and say no don't cut yourself "Shutting her eyes Laura had ran home straight into the kitchen and grabbed a knife." could feel those harsh words she overheard from her friend. I like this story a lot, really a lot of hurt emotions here, and at the end hope. I like the ending sentence "She learnt that cutting just because she was hurt was wrong and painful to herself and her family." it is something that doesn't only hurt you but the others around you as well. I like that she did tell her parents and show them her diary, what she had been doing, that she got help so she could be better, and around people at the new school who would care for and love her for her. I enjoyed the feelings here in the story, really good, liked it a lot.

[Daniel88Batson]

That was a really powerfull passage. I love the fact that it's so enclosed, representing the enclosed mental state of somebody like Laura here. You could possibly throw some more literary features in there to really jazz it up. But you should be proud of that piece. I really read a piece which describes the feelings like you did there.