After Life

What is it you have to say about this world?

At worst, I say it's interesting,

at its best, a little less than that.

Little strings of perfection

are dangled at the claws of man

who handle them as commodities

to be bought and sold as souls,

but perfect, in the end, is boring

and the product stinks as such.

Whether burning or bowing violins,

stringing harps, or tapping tambourines,

ever so lightly, so as to not disturb things,

no slapping or banging in this band.

This land of everlasting lacks something.

 

Reviews

[Dani California]

Self. It lacks self. I had to redo this review. I read it differently at first glance and upon reading the second time, it occured to me that you were speaking of heaven and hell, not earth. (paying attn to titles helps too..duh..lol).

What I mean by it lacks self is, from how Heaven has been portrayed by man, it is almost passionless. As if we all become hollow and happy. Oxymoron? Or no? Hmm. I don't believe everything I read...lol. It's all interpretation and theory. I believe Heaven exists, yes. But until I speak to someone who has actually been there personally, and stayed for awhile to check it all out, I'll draw my own conclusions from the fantasy that exists in my mind. And of course, hell lacks a lot of things, I'm sure.

This is really the surface view of what I'm trying to say -- this is a much deeper and broader subject that you write about, and you've made a very good point! Leaving the reader to ponder ... what comes next?

I love this piece. It's quite brilliant.

Great job!