A dreadful Haiku

The air is cold its freezing wind like piercing ice,

The sting of a something being burnt frozen,

Air pressure taking up these small confined walls,

Stones the color of obsidian that is the foundation of this realm,

It feels lost, isolation, abandonment, betrayal, hypocrisy....... evil 

At the center of the labyrinth is a bell tower,

 The top is a clock,

numbers but no hands,

During random intervals the bell will crash against the blood red steel,

The sound unsettling that will make one's soul shiver in dread

Author's Note

Please be as honest as you want. Thank you for your time.

Reviews

[emmajoygreen]

A beautiful poem but is it a haiku, sir?

'A haiku is a short, traditional Japanese poem consisting of three lines, typically following a 5, 7, 5 syllable structure, focusing on a brief moment, often related to nature, and capturing an image or feeling in a simple, evocative way without rhyme. While the 5-7-5 pattern is common in English, the core idea is capturing a single, focused impression, with classical Japanese haiku often using "cutting words" (kireji) and seasonal references (kigo). (5-7-5).
Theme: Traditionally about nature, seasons, or a specific moment in time.
Feeling: Aims to create a strong image or feeling, like a snapshot in words.
Origin: Evolved from the hokku, the opening stanza of longer Japanese poems, becoming independent around the 17th century.

[someguy772]

Ok fair enough. I am new to poetry at least in the sense of publishing my works. So maybe the official title could use some work, but thank you for your time read and correction on what this writing should be.

[emmajoygreen]

Now reading my review, it read arrogantly and I apologise profusely for that.

[Curly Grace]

This one has such a cold, eerie vibe to it. The imagery builds this feeling of being trapped in a dark, unsettling place, and that bell. with no hands on the clock, it really sticks with you. It’s got a strong, haunting atmosphere.

[someguy772]

Thank you so much for your time, also thank you for your review. That was the tone/ mood I was trying to set with this